Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[humblegar]

"I'm sure they will take the long path"

--
alternatively "I'm glad those drawbridges are finally linked up" o_O

[Sus]

"Meh, it's just two goblin swordsmen, go chop their heads off, Urist!"
Urist McRecruit's right hand
A pool of Udil McMarkswarf's dwarven blood
Udil McMarksdwarf's mutilated corpse
Asuth McAxdorf's left lower leg
...

"Okay, I'll just let the cyclops in the foyer and fill him with bolts, what could possibly go wrong?"
(A: The river-damming Floodgate-o'-DOOM™ that was supposed to act as an emergency self-destruct mechanism was conveniently located in said foyer.)

"Now, I'll be able to seal the fort shut with just a flick of a lever. I am invincible! ... Pull the lever! Pull the goddamn lever before it's too la... *gurgle* <'Sus' Lolocatten, Foreman has bled to death.>"

Oh, and from my very first embark... "F this, this channeling stuff is way too complicated, I'll just punch right through the side of this lake here..."
--> Enter the Fun... --> Run for the Mountainhomes!

[Olith McHuman]

The two vampires, the outpost liaison (who is in a permanent conduct meeting state with my vampire mayor), and that ghost will see everything that is trying to sneak into my fort.

Yay! The titan is dead! Oh right, evil biome.

[Aspgren]

"Where is he? Where is that goddamn necromancer?? Oh god the refuse pile ..."

[Kogut]

<post to watch>

[Zsword]

"To the cavern Layer!"

*a couple fortresses later...*

"To The Magma Sea!"

[Frogwarrior]

"Eh, most of my dwarves are legendary and the best have candy suits and artifact weapons... I think I'm ready for the circus. I just have to station my dudes near the candy mines and breach it, that's good enough right?"





I wasn't ready for the circus.

[Muttonhawk]

"Pfft, dragon fire doesn't do too much harm in Skyrim, why should it here?"

[imperium3]

"It's OK, we're behind fortifications, nothing can possibly hit us from he-"

[Psieye]

"Ok, I've modded gold, lead and platinum to be weapons metals in my raws so I can have hideous bash weapons. I've also modded out bows and crossbows from goblins and humans. Time to start my adventurer without worrying about BS bandit ambushes."

*Adventurer cancels fast travel: Kobold ambush with platinum arrows*

[rhesusmacabre]

"Those humans sieging us are just sitting on the edge of the map in small groups. Let's all go and take them out squad by squad and we'll outnumber them each time!"

I'd just sent my entire military after the first squad when: "A vile force of darkness has arrived!"

It did get quite messy.

[Doro]

"pfft, fuck this shit, we are doomed"

most common for me...

[Tiruin]

"They're just zombies."

Forgetting my FPS.

[Olith McHuman]

I'll just station my super military over my drop pit's bridge, pull the lever to open my front gate and the siege will be over.
Oops, wrong lever.
*splat* x20

[jaxy15]

"My danger room trained military clad in steel can surely defeat the clowns!"