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Author Topic: Calm and Cool Progressive Discussion Thread  (Read 1293353 times)

MetalSlimeHunt

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Re: Calm and Cool Progressive Discussion Thread
« Reply #9510 on: February 23, 2015, 10:13:03 pm »

Can someone tell me why gay people use the word "partner?" I get that it's an identity thing and that some people oscillate sexual identities like the most sexual jello but I don't get why, for example, a gay woman has to call her girlfriend her "partner." To me it just seems like it's awkward on purpose, idk though, someone probably understands this better than I do.

This seemed like the right thread, sorry if there's a thread I shoulda posted in that I missed or something.
I've seen plenty of gay people use husband/wife/girlfriend/boyfriend, but "partner" seems to be a relic of the more transitional period of LGBT rights where lots of things regarding same-sex relationships were heavily sanitized to counter the previous focus on how That's Degeneracy, Timmy. So you have a "life partner" in your "union". No sweaty gay sex here, no sir. You might consider it a way to navigate during a period where the mainline with straight people is "I probably hate you because you're an abberant, but not enough to go out of my way to destroy you".

Alternatively, it's plausible deniability (what, no, not that kind of partner, who do you think I am?) or a conscious rejection of mainstream terminology.
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Bauglir

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Re: Calm and Cool Progressive Discussion Thread
« Reply #9511 on: February 23, 2015, 10:20:49 pm »

I like that it's more evocative of the relationship, m'self. Like, "girlfriend" says, what, you have a friend who's a girl? I know I'm being a bit facetious, but to whatever extent labels are nice, it is certainly nice to have an umbrella term for the entire class of relationships, given that the particular sex, gender, other identity qualities, and formality and depth of the relationship are almost never relevant to people outside it. As uneasy as it makes me feel to say "maybe less nuance in language is a good idea", here we are.
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Descan

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Re: Calm and Cool Progressive Discussion Thread
« Reply #9512 on: February 23, 2015, 10:35:16 pm »

That said, Fuzzbutt hates the term.

So instead, I call him fuzzbutt. (Well, generally, he calls ME fuzzbutt. I reserve the right to never tell you what he has my contact info named in his phone. Ever.)

And mock him mercilessly for it. "So you're my partner." "Oh god no." "My sex partner. Who does the sex with me. Sexually. Partsexner. Or boyfriend. Boypartner. Partnerfriend. Pard'ner. Howdy." "..."
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KingofstarrySkies

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Re: Calm and Cool Progressive Discussion Thread
« Reply #9513 on: February 23, 2015, 10:44:38 pm »

descan you make my add look like i'm just a knob
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ggamer

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Re: Calm and Cool Progressive Discussion Thread
« Reply #9514 on: February 23, 2015, 10:46:48 pm »

Whenever I hear people knocking homosexuality I want to show them descan and have them honestly tell me how mad they are.

Descan

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Re: Calm and Cool Progressive Discussion Thread
« Reply #9515 on: February 23, 2015, 10:56:29 pm »

ADD, Koss? I have that too, actually. >____>

And uh... Thanks, GG? I think? :P
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KingofstarrySkies

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Re: Calm and Cool Progressive Discussion Thread
« Reply #9516 on: February 23, 2015, 10:59:36 pm »

:3

ADD bros~
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4maskwolf

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Re: Calm and Cool Progressive Discussion Thread
« Reply #9517 on: February 23, 2015, 11:01:21 pm »

Hehehe all of the ADD peoples.

Assuming we're talking about Attention Deficit Disorder here.  Never heard it used any other way, but if it's something else in this context, I'm probably not that.

Descan

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Re: Calm and Cool Progressive Discussion Thread
« Reply #9518 on: February 23, 2015, 11:05:27 pm »

At least for me, that's what I mean. I've never heard it used in any other way, except possibly "Add and subtract," but context cues say probably not. :P
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Owlbread

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Re: Calm and Cool Progressive Discussion Thread
« Reply #9519 on: February 24, 2015, 03:20:55 am »

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

In the UK people tend to use the term "partner" as a unisex expression for significant other nowadays. It tends to be someone you're not married to, but live with. It can be used to refer to people in a same sex relationship but it's even more commonly heard as a term for older people in a relationship. I think in the UK at least it's seen as slightly weird to talk about elderly people having "boyfriends" or "girlfriends" so we just say "partner" instead because it sounds more respectable. I believe you can use it for even married people.
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UXLZ

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Re: Calm and Cool Progressive Discussion Thread
« Reply #9520 on: February 24, 2015, 03:33:17 am »

I've been using that word for ages.
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Re: Calm and Cool Progressive Discussion Thread
« Reply #9521 on: February 24, 2015, 04:40:18 am »

Partner is also used in the German language to refer to same-sex couples.
I guess that it's a more formal term than going full Greek and call them lovers.
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scriver

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Re: Calm and Cool Progressive Discussion Thread
« Reply #9522 on: February 24, 2015, 12:12:41 pm »

In the UK people tend to use the term "partner" as a unisex expression for significant other nowadays. It tends to be someone you're not married to, but live with.

Yes, it's the same up here.
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TD1

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Re: Calm and Cool Progressive Discussion Thread
« Reply #9523 on: February 24, 2015, 12:30:28 pm »

In the UK people tend to use the term "partner" as a unisex expression for significant other nowadays. It tends to be someone you're not married to, but live with.

Yes, it's the same up here.
My mum got rather annoyed when someone on the phone called her my dad's partner a few times, despite her correcting her my saying "husband" after each "partner."
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Helgoland

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Re: Calm and Cool Progressive Discussion Thread
« Reply #9524 on: February 24, 2015, 12:42:05 pm »

Partner is also used in the German language to refer to same-sex couples.
I guess that it's a more formal term than going full Greek and call them lovers.
It's unisex, actually. Well, if the partner's a woman you'd have to say 'Partnerin', 'female partner', but that's just because the German language is big on grammatical genders.
It'd be a bit unusual to use it for a traditional relationship, though - if you're married, you just call each other 'Mann' and 'Frau' (literally 'man' and 'woman'), and if not you'll likelly say 'Mein Freund' and 'Meine Freundin' ('my male friend' and 'my female friend', which occasionally leads to confusion about whether a particular 'Freund' is a romantic or a non-romantic friend).
Using a language with grammatical gender must be hell for LBGTROPN+ people for who this is a serious issue.
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