Vanya's Journals, Chapter 47: ParasolYou continue reading, curious to hear the continuation of Vanya's story. Parasol had won the battle... they’d destroyed the Ballpoint army, and only a few survivors had managed to escape. Klade didn't care, though... I found him early that first morning as I stood atop the hill, gazing down upon the smoking carnage with a listless stare.
"There is no honor in this war," he chattered grimly as he limped up to where I stood. "We have killed too many soldiers... A
hundred scythods could never consume them all. This is no victory, as 'Parassol' claims, but a great sorrow."
I agreed quietly. "I think so, too."
We were silent for several moments, but then I asked, "Klade... what about K'bahth? Where is he?"
Klade only clicked his claws and turned away, softly cursing the Klascoryf as he left.
Trebor found me soon after. I was relieved to see him still alive, but he only brought me the news of the deaths of Saemin, Jonah, and Lieutenant Almory.
"I'm sorry, Trebor," I said quietly. "I know how it hurts to lose a sister, too."
He only nodded, slipping a sword and scabbard off his belt. "She would've wanted you to have this," the dwarf told me quietly. "She was a woman of her word... and she lost the bet. Parasol prevailed."
When I tried to put my arms around him to show I cared, he shrugged me off. His joking personality was all but gone... he seemed to have gained a portion of his sister's hatred, and I haven't heard him call me "Hotlips" since. I wish he would, now... it's strange what things you miss when they're gone.
I followed him back to the trench's infirmary, where we found Strohe and Lurit, both barely alive. Trebor, like any good doctor, put aside his feelings and tended to their wounds... but I could see the emptiness in his eyes. He would never say it, but he wished he'd died with his sister. It was a feeling I knew well.
As that first, painful afternoon wore on, Tedaz and I started working to clear the debris out of the cluttered walkway, mostly to get our minds off what had happened. Unfortunately, it wasn't long before a Parasol officer told us the trench was ruined, and it was too dangerous to stay. He told me to move to one of the white tents Parasol had set up on the hillside, away from the wreckage of the battle, and so I did.
Looking through the tents, I soon found Katie. The battlefield medics were treating her, and they didn't seem very worried about her physical wounds. Though her arm and shoulder were patched up before the first day was over, she hadn't been able to take the mental trauma... only the gods know what horrible things she saw. For the most part, I stayed with her from then on, though guilt often drew me back to the trench against my will.
The next few days flew by quickly. While Strohe, Lurit, and Katie's conditions slowly improved, I never saw John again... not even his body... though I did find a dusty, charred message from him, lying atop Almory's paperwork on her desk:
"From John, to Lieutenant Almory:
I realize it's late for me to say it, and I feel ashamed, but it must be said; I haven't trusted Vanya's plan ever since you told it to me, and I don't think I'll be coming back from this. My true name is Escu Honukem, and I come from the village of Helmspear. If by some chance you ever find yourself up that way... let my family know I died fighting our enemies. Don't let them know I was a coward. Don't let them know I ever joined Ballpoint." In addition to John's body being missing, we never found the bodies of Tames or Gearbox, either. I assumed Tames had joined Ballpoint's retreating forces... but I hoped Gearbox was all right. I hoped he would head towards Spearbreakers, and that I would find him there someday. As to John himself, I like to pretend he survived. I like to imagine him getting back to his family, far away at Helmspear - their tears and embraces as they reunite after all those years apart. It's a comforting thought, but it's far from being all that's on my mind.
I often thought about what Joseph had said. I was sure he was lying... After all, how could Parasol lack any sense of morality? Joseph was a liar, I knew, and I resolved not to believe him, but as the medics treated their wounded, I saw little hints of what he'd said. If someone on life support became considered a lost cause, they would let the person die rather than keep him alive. They're calculating people... even more so than dwarves. Dwarves will let an injured soldier lie in the hospital for years. It stood out in stark contrast to what I was witnessing with the battlefield medics.
The fourth morning, I sat in the tent, talking quietly with Reudh beside Katie's bed. Suddenly, she awoke, sitting upright and panting as if she was terrified, her widened eyes dancing about the medical equipment that surrounded us. Her gaze found me and softened as realization overtook her fragile mind; she hung her head, collapsing towards me and crying. I put my arms around her and told her I understood, just as I'd done so many times before for Salaia.
We came closer those next few days than many people come in a lifetime. She became like a sister to me... as Salaia had been, but different. She was a friend.
She was recovering quickly... but she was bottling up what had happened. I've always done the same thing, but Katie is a happy person at heart... she doesn't like for something to get her down. I'm not sure if she'd forgotten the things she'd seen or not, but she never spoke of them again.
~~~
As the week ended, I stood atop Megaportal Hill one last time, watching the sun's setting rays color the graves of the fallen. Reudh stood beside me, as did Katie and Trebor, Reudh, Tedaz and Lurit. Klade had left with Strohe, who wanted to return home. No one in Parasol spoke Scythod, and I lied to the officers about what Klade had said... I told them he was escorting Strohe to the border of the bloodplains. Klade was part of the timewar, and we "natives" of Everoc weren't supposed to know about him, but I didn't care. The way things were going, everyone would eventually find out anyway, so what did it matter?
Eight graves lay out before us, their tenants' names engraved into the dark, metallic headstones with love: K'bahth, Saemin Lo Diel, Hawkins Entomel, Jonah Hylcelon, Almory Mallarkus Bertran, Martin "Gearbox" Bakerson, Cronan Tames, and Escu "John Smith" Honukem. Their runes glowed with a soft light, and those belonging to Parasol flashed with little video clips of their lives. The images of their faces, laughing at parties, goofing off... normally watching clips like those would make a person happy, but the knowledge that they were gone from the world tore unrelentingly at my heart.
Katie tried to say a little prayer for each of them, but she couldn't even make it to Saemin's before she started to break down.
"I'm sorry," Katie said quietly, her voice staggered with emotion. "I can't do it."
Trebor gave her a light embrace and nodded grimly, trying to keep his voice level. "When we get back home, I'll write a memoir... 'In Memory of the Fallen'. They deserve for Parasol to remember them... it wasn't their fault they died." He shot a piercing glance in my direction as he said that last.
Turning, I walked away, looking over the distant hills and forests towards the sunset. A tear threatened to fall, and I didn't even feel like brushing it away. I felt terrible.
"You care deeply about their deaths, but believe me when I say it is not your fault, sweet Vanya."
Looking over my shoulder, I saw Reudh, who was gazing at me sympathetically. "It
is my fault," I told him quietly, wiping my face with a hand and turning my head away. "If I hadn't been trying to get back to Spearbreakers, none of this would have happened."
"I agree," Reudh said quietly. "You saved two lives when they all would have died."
Shooting a twisted, scornful glance at the dwarf, I tried not to cry. "K'bahth and John died, too, Reudh!"
"Parasol may yet win back Everoc due to their sacrifice," he countered. "It was a good thing you did! Do not doubt yourself, my dear. Trebor and Katie will live on, telling their story and bringing others to their cause."
I spun to face him, angry and upset. "Reudh, have you
ever lost anyone?" I didn't wait for him to reply before I went on, "Have you ever lost everyone you loved, and found yourself alone? No friends, no family, nobody left but you? Do you know how that feels?"
"Well, I -"
Though I tried my best, I couldn't hold back my tears. "That's how I felt when I lost my sister, Reudh! I wanted to
die. I had nothing left to live for, and the only thing that kept me alive was trying to save Spearbreakers from Ballpoint. I never even had a chance to go back for her body." I pursed my lips, stepping forwards and glaring at him through blurred eyes. "Don't tell me I did a good job. Trebor and Katie are suffering more than you know." I paused for breath, and felt guilty when I finally noticed how hurt Reudh seemed at what I'd said.
"I am... truly sorry, Vanya..." he managed in response, wringing his pack in his hands. "I did not... I apologize."
Starting to cry, I closed my eyes and hung my head, wishing I could lie down and never have to get back up. I felt his arm move around my back as he held me close, but I didn't bother move away. I knew he was trying to help me feel better, but I didn't
want him to do anything for me... I just wanted him to
understand.
"I know it hurts," Reudh said finally, "but believe me when I say it wasn't your fault. It was Tames's."
It quieted me, and I looked up at him curiously, brushing the hair from my eyes as I processed what he'd told me. "Tames?"
The dwarf nodded. "He betrayed us by telling Ballpoint our plans. Now come; our friends are ready to enter the portal to Parasol. Are you going with them?" With a gentle hand on my back, he started to lead me away from the sunset.
I nodded. "Yes..." I said, sniffing. "I'm going to Parasol, and then to Spearbreakers"
"And I shall come with you," Reudh said reassuringly. "Where you go, I shall go as well, my sweetest love."
Sometimes he was nice to have around, but others, not so much. I spared a disapproving glance at him for his affections, but he didn't seem to notice.
"Vanya, hurry!" Katie called. She was standing beside the megaportal's rippling, silver surface, holding a kit bag in each hand. Groups of people were skipping in line around her and disappearing into the portal. As I neared her, she explained, "It's set to our destination, but only briefly. We're holding other people up." She motioned behind us, and looking where she pointed, I saw a squad of white-suited Parasol soldiers standing at attention.
"Then let's go," I told her, starting forwards.
She dropped a bag and grabbed my hand. "Do you have a place to live?"
"I won't be at Parasol long."
"They won't let you leave," she said, picking her bag back up and handing it to me. "I already asked. Admiral Coscar says Sleeper Agents aren't allowed to leave."
This stopped me, and I looked back at her, gaping and stricken with disbelief. "What?? Why not?!"
Katie frowned apologetically, tilting her head. "They said it's classified. I'm really sorry... but if you want, you can stay with me at my dad's house. He's let my friends sleep over before, so I don't think he'll mind. But... um..." She stopped, looking uncomfortable.
"What?"
She grimaced briefly, and then, with a pleading glance, said, "Call him 'Mr. Kenzon'... and don't let him know who you are." At my questioning stare, Katie added, "Please?"
"Okay..." I said, giving a cautious nod as I shifted her bag in my hands.
"C'mon," she coaxed, and side by side, we started towards the towering structure.
As we climbed the steps at its base, I decided that someday, I
was going back to Spearbreakers... no matter what it took.
And the portal's liquid surface enveloped us, so different from the portals of Ballpoint.
I walked for a moment, blind in the darkness of a metaphysical dimension. I felt a strange sensation, as if I was being funneled through nothingness, yet my legs continued to carry me forwards across an undetectable floor.
Sounds buffeted my ears; everything grew bright as I crossed the interspace threshold and got my first glimpse of Parasol. Katie's bag fell unnoticed from my fingers.
I stood in awe at the portal's base, dwarfed by the gigantic chamber dimly lit with beautiful chandeliers the shape of upturned parasols. The walls were thousands upon thousands of glass panes, holding back a clear, blue sea. Through its crystalline depths, I could see distant shapes: giant cathedrals, beautiful monuments, towers stretching high into the ocean above. Huge creatures swam past in pinks and blues, spinning and dancing through the waters as they trailed phosphorescent ribbons in their wake. Unaware of the passage of time, I followed one's near-magical descent until it disappeared from view behind me.
A hand took mine, and I started, looking up at its owner's face.
"You're not in Kansas anymore," Katie whispered with an impish smile, picking up her bag.
"What? What is 'Kansas'?" I asked in confusion.
She gave a little laugh. "I'll explain later. Let's just get out of here before Parasol's reporters get to us," she said, pointing at the receptionist's O-shaped desk in front of us, where a handful of people were clamoring to get a better shot with their little cameras. "Retaking Everoc is big news, obviously, but they'll pester us to no end."
"Like hell they will," Lurit grunted, watching the reporters jostle each other around with light amusement. Beside him, Reudh held his pike idly, too rapt in examining the beauty about him to notice the reporters at all.
One of them got past the guards and rushed up to Trebor with a PEA in hand. "I'm Yolas Maxtur for Parasol Daily - can you give me a statement about 48D's involvement in battle 7165b8?"
It freaked me out. I started to hyperventilate, my eyes darting from one reporter to the next, then at Katie, who was laughing and talking to Reudh. After hiding who I was all my life, I wasn't used to this kind of attention, and it scared me out of rational thought.
Ducking behind everyone, I crept along the walls in the shadows, hoping they wouldn't notice me. I felt bewildered. Apparently 48D's return to Parasol was a big event, and everything was in such chaos that nobody saw me slink past the guards, moving past a corner of the room to one of the alcoves at the edge. Not even Katie seemed to notice I was gone, and it was with a good deal of relief that I watched the little crowd mill about the receptionist's desk, completely oblivious to my presence.
A voice startled me, bearing a heavy human accent. "You don't like crowds either."
Spinning around, I found myself looking at the stomach of an unusually tall woman. With my eyes, I followed her muscled frame up to a badly-scarred face. I couldn't figure out how I'd not noticed she was there. She didn't appear very old, even for a human... maybe 50 at most.
"Who are you?" I asked uncomfortably, trying not to stare at her disfigurement. It looked like she'd suffered terrible burns at some point in her life.
She sat herself down on the little bench in the alcove, leaning on her cane for support, and chuckled with an undertone of grief. "A more important question is, who are
you? When a girl is sidestepping the guards to avoid the reporters, it makes her look like she has something to hide... and what's happen to your ears?" she added, leaning to the side and peering at them with an innocent, curious expression.
Reddening, I snatched Jack Magnus's cap from a pouch, pulling it over them. "I'm an elf," I whispered in embarrassment.
She didn't seem to recognize the word. "I haven't saw none of them here before, so I guess you're an offworlder, like me... but you couldn't have work in no mines because you don't have the build for it." She peered at me curiously. "So where are you from, child?"
I hesitated. She didn't seem especially intelligent, but she didn't seem untrustworthy. Then again, I'd been wrong before. "I'm from Everoc..." I said quietly, watching as she raised a surprised eyebrow. "I grew up hiding in a fortress of dwarves... most dwarves on Everoc hate elves."
"A skulker..." the woman said thoughtfully, staring meaninglessly off into the distance as she rested her hands on her cane. "And an Everoccan, at that..."
"I'm just not used to all that attention."
The woman jumped at my words, and then looked back at me, smiling sadly. "I am Eltsha, child. I were a skulker in my childhood years, also." She patted the bench beside her. "Sit."
"My name is Vanya," I replied. Without questioning, I took a seat beside her. It felt awkward... I wasn't sure whether to watch her face, or look away from her scars. More than that, I'd learned from a young age that skulkers couldn't often be trusted. I decided to dig further, asking, "Why are you here?"
Eltsha sighed. "I know they say he was dead, but I was hoping to see my son." She looked over at me, pursing her lips, wrinkled lines crossing her scarred face. "Are you a mother, child?"
"I don't have any family now, but I raised my sister," I offered.
She turned her gaze towards the crowd at the desk. "Then mayhap you know how I feel." She paused for a minute, and continued with a thoughtful sigh, "I keep expecting to see him walk out that portal... calling for me like he use to every time he come home..." She looked back down at me with moistened eyes, smiling at me sadly. "...and he
doesn't come back, nor will he now. The dust is taking him away... yet I still hope."
I knew how it felt to lose someone you love. "I'm sorry, Eltsha... I'm sure he was a good man."
The woman nodded quickly. "Oh yes! He was. He always work to provide food for us, and when his sister got sick, he went off to war, because it make more money. But... he couldn't save everyone. No one can save everyone."
A yell interrupted us. "Vanya?" a girl called, her voice distant.
"Go on, child," Eltsha urged gently. "Your friend is wanting you."
As I got to my feet and started back towards Katie, I cast one more sympathetic glance at the old woman, her words echoing in my mind.
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Topic: [34.11] Spearbreakers - It shudders and begins to move (Read 2280121 times)