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[Heliman]

I only consider something a person if at least one member of it's species is capable of basic calculus.

I'm looking at YOU, Jocks. You get off this time.

Also, dolphins, somebody get them a waterproof calculator with big, nose-bumpable buttons. We will see.

[Max White]

Oh be fair Heliman. No need to insult their intellect by providing them with a giant novelty calculator for some basic calculus. I'm sure they can find the gradient of a curve without electronic devices... Because if they can't, it is dolphin sandwiches for me!

[zchris13]

Dolphin sandwiches are pretty good. But then again, it's dolphin the fish, not dolphin the aquatic mammal.

[Chaoswizkid]

We should grant them the status of "rival".

I guess we picked the fire type as our starter, then...

[Solifuge]

Well, if you think about it too hard, humans basically are a fire-type. It was our first big cultural invention, and sorta the symbol for all technology and culture to come, from cooking food over embers and telling oral histories around a campfire, to internal-combustion-powered machines.

[kaijyuu]

The leprechaun tells me to burn things.

[Loud Whispers]

The leprechaun tells me to burn things.

I like you.

[Criptfeind]

Also, dogs should be considered a person. Anything capable of socially bonding with a person should!

This is a terrible idea. Dogs right now basically are slaves, granting them the rights of a person would seriously fuck with that, to the determent of the dogs. Although perhaps finding a way to communicate complex thoughts with them, then granting them such rights, might be a good idea.

Also: "Anything capable of socially bonding with a person should!" That is like... A lot of things. Rats for one. I don't think we are ready to consider rats people. Basically any critter that CAN socially bond can socially bond with humans.

[Cthulhu]

So, is there any peer-reviewed literature supporting this?

[GlyphGryph]

Supporting what, exactly?

[zchris13]

The OP, probably.

[MetalSlimeHunt]

Although perhaps finding a way to communicate complex thoughts with them, then granting them such rights, might be a good idea.

To be fair, we do already grant most species with observable aspects of intelligence certain rights, hence why animal abuse is a crime.

[Criptfeind]

Right. But. They certainly do not have a ton of rights. Like my dog is not even allowed to go outside without being on a leash and he is required for all times in his life to wear a collar. How fucked up would that be when applied to a human (Or "person")?

He also clearly has Stockholm syndrome.

[Dutchling]

At least he doesn't has the top of his skull replaced with a plastic cover. My brother performs mojo jojo on monkeys and I've seen his monkeys once. He says they don't really care but it looks pretty creepy.

[Criptfeind]

Whhhhhhhat.