"Nuffle damn it, you ssssack of sssskin, sssstop whining, get up and play! It'sssss only a flesssh wound!"
With Mejj and Rexx nursing injuries that put them out of the last game, and Mazz and Tyrr in less than stellar condition, the Stormers look to face a difficult match, lacking the muscle that they do. The injuries knock the TV difference down to a mere 200,000 gold pieces, buying a dubious bonedoctor and booze for the human side. Which is odd, considering the lack of likely injuries by the lizard side.
To add discomfort to injury, the match is set on a pitch covered in snow, in the frigid north. Although winning the toss and electing to receive, the cold-blooded critters don't look to be enjoying the locale, although don't look any different for it. Being blue-skinned already, that's not exactly obvious. Roused on by the cheering crowds as the ball goes skywards, the skink Sorr manages to catch the ball with little worry. Although a few saurus-provided shoves clears the way for an early push, Weyy, despite being nimble-clawed, fails to make good on a quick pass to Novv that leaves the ball on the snow-covered ground.
Almost immediately the humans go to close down the set-up for the drive, putting pressure on the skinks staring at the fallen ball as if it were about to explode. A few quick shoves under the combined might of three, small, stunty lizard things bringing down a grown man leaves Weyy pace to scoop up the ball and hurl to Garr, who catches it easily, despite the longer distance involved. With the ball in claw, the skink surges forward, sure-footed and fast, while the rest of the team tries to prevent the brutish Dagg Silent from leaving the line of scrimmage.
Not that it does much good - with a quick shove and the ogre just walking away from the skinks attempting to bring him down, Dagg manages to put some severe pressure on Garr. Tackle by tackle, the skinks find support diminishing, either too far back or brought down by the soft-skinned human side. Still, with a good sprint, Jarr manages to shove the ogre obstruction out the way, and Garr wastes no time in scoring a touchdown, slamming the ball in the endzone to put the lizards 1-0 up.
Vorr kicks off, and proves his ineptitude at anything involving the bal by hoofing it into the Stormers' reserve box, despite the humans having the upper hand in the defensive lineup, which they'll surely need. The humans waste no time in instituting a box, a mass of muscle and armour protecting the touchback-carrying Eomund, the humans' rookie thrower. While Dagg forgets what to do, the humans gang up on the muscle of the line of scrimmage, forcing down Jarr. Still, Vorr forces the corners of the box back, looking to slow down and put pressure on the ball-carrying human, while the rest of the skinks move to support or defend, Takk thinning the ranks with a knockout punch to Knight Advar.
The entire thing is rendered more moot than a Halfling Cookoff as Bertolf shoves Sorr into Vorr, who gets smacked into the ground by Dagg who realised what he was supposed to be doing. Eomund runs forth, backed up by Seneschal Sigric and Grant Valdred, and Manfred the Friendly who proves what a misnomer his name is on the field by shunting away Weyy to get there. A long charge from Jarr after shoving Awrod away puts Sigric down, and pressure once more on Eomund as the skinks scramble to defend.
Grant shoves Ravv out of the way, and Bertolf knocks Jarr back, 'though the efforts slow down the humans from scoring immediately, at least. Most of the skinks work on repositioning - walling off the run the humans have, putting pressure on the team, trying to prevent scoring opportunities by being nimble as fuck. An oversight leaves catcher Galahad undefended, and a quick shove leaves him open enough, while the ball-carrier defence goes down. For the most part, the human side works on keeping the skins down, rather than able to move about, as Galahad repositions to within an easy run to the endzone, but ends up having to wrestle Takk to the ground. As Novv runs back in to join the fray, the humans seem poised to score as the clock ticks down.
A smack from Bertolf leaves Tyrr out of the match, aggravating his concussion and sending the veteran skink to the apothecary hut. The rest of the team, however, seem to persist in feeding the meat-grinder, though an opportunity to bring down Eomund opens and the skinks go for it - although Garr goes down against Eomund in a failed tackle. Bertolf lands a tackle that smashes Weyy's knee, and Sigric clears the way for Eomund, the thrower, to run the ball in, putting the scoreline level at half-time.
While neither of the wounded skinks get up (obviously), both unconscious humans are roused by the sexy, sexy Bloodweiser babes (with the advantage of being the same species at the time) as the skinks get ready to kick off. At least this time, Vorr manages to keep the ball on-field with the boot, although the humans get a quick snap that lets them reposition enough to fovus their forces on the right. Once more, the box forms, a mountain of muscle protecting the touchdown-scoring Eomund, as Dagg makes short work of those he stands by. Mostly to skinks.
The skinks don't waste time in pressuring the humans, given that they have a whole half to hang on to settle with a draw, at the very least. Not that it seems to be doing much good, the humans using their superior teamwork and abilities to drop skinks left and right, fuel for the meatgrinder that the ogre gets stuck into as well, just adding hassle to woe for the lizard side, although Tezz brings down Galahad, knocking him into Eomund and towards the touchline, and leaving him in a precarious position facing down Jarr.
For all the good that does. Knight Advar knocks Jarr into the stands, while Sorr gets knocked out for even thinking to try and stop the human side. Down to nine once more for the drive, and lacking the muscle that Jarr provides, it seems like the humans have this one in the bag if they can wrangle another touchdown, which is a likely prospect, given the difficulty the skinks are having in even handling the ball. The box slowly moves forward, of course, inching towards the touchline without a care in the world. At this point there is seriously little the skinks can do, stalling and slowing down in a futile gesture without muscle or numbers to back it up int he slightest. Mazz gets knocked out by a blow from Dagg, while Novv gets shoved off-field, the humans moving close enough to make the entire defence a non-issue and impossibility all in one. Nirr and Ravv try and slow down the box inches from the endzone, but the lockdown just means that a pass, and a dump-off, puts the ball in the hands of Grant Valdred, who runs the ball in to put the Marauders up 2-1.
The skinks line up in a death-or-draw lineup, focusing on the offense immesurably. A quick snap lets them get the drop on the humans, letting Garr hold the ball as he surges forth, and the rest of the team to back him up. Ravv manages to latch on to the legs of Bertolf to bring him down as he tries to slip away and put pressure on Garr, leaving the ball-carrying skink runner to easily score, bringing the scoreline level with only moments of the game left.
Nonetheless, Irzz kicks off, the ball sailing high to be caught by Eomund. Instead of running for once, the thrower actually throws the damn ball for once, sending it to Odamar (who has probably been waiting all game to hold the ball), running back to prevent the skinks from getting a sniff. Not that they'd have time to score all the same, and the clock ticks down with both sides at 2-2.
Despite being a frustrating (and oftentimes dull) game, the fans rated it highly, despite the fact that the humans slowly walked downfield with the ball, while the skinks actually ran around. MVPs, nonetheless, were Knight Advar for casting a saurus into the stands, while Novv gets the Stormers' for having a pretty head-feather-crown-thing.
(... I was lucky for the quick snap. That is the only reason I managed to draw despite the fact I was a lot of muscle down and couldn't break the box for the life of me. I daresay the humans might have done better if they'd taken a few chances, and maybe secured a win for sure, but there you go. Looks like that last crippling game was the final nail in the coffin for the skinks to get a sniff at the trophy, though.)