Thanks, everyone, for all of your well-wishes.
I'm not gone yet (is that mafia game over? No), but I really appreciate your kindness. I'll be sure to listen to this stuff over the next couple of days =) Oh, and for those of you who have PM'd me about physical meetups/letters/other forms of contact, I'm trying to work something out. Before I leave, there will certainly be some decision made.
And Protactinium--I do realize that the internet is not the problem, but my own personal weaknesses. However, it has become the solution to so very many issues I have that it's making it harder for me to grow up and develop a wide range of adaptive strategies--better to sit about ruminating, if nothing else, because at least then I would have to introspect seriously. I never have to look at myself honestly, because I'm always feeding myself through a societal lens. I never have to clean myself up and look for friends, because on the net I'm spiffy enough. I like it here. It's sheltering. I feel accepted and acceptable. It's so easy to make excuses for every little thing, or hide them.
The truth is, I did really need to be here, once. My time here has been enormously valuable and well-spent. However, I do think that the time has come to jolt myself from my little nest and take the warmth y'all have given me, and try to face the world again. I spent years in emotional and social stasis after my cousin died. I closed my face to the world and couldn't be honest about any part of my feelings. Now that I have learned to be more honest with people, and trust in their kindness, I have to go back to the world I abandoned and make my way there.
Basically, I find it too easy to slip into routine, and I've got to break out of it. I have an irritatingly long concentration span (7+ hours straight), and I seldom get truly bored--so I'm remarkably susceptible to something like the internet eating gobs of time. It's a very good trait, but it's not helpful at all when combined with certain habits.
So, for now... to the welcoming arms of my beloved.