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[Vilhelm]

Hello my fellow psychopaths DF players!
I am tired of all these migrants that keeps being accepted into my fort just by asking "Hey, can I die horribly live here?", what if they are goblins in disguise!
So I am planning on setting up some kind of test that every dwarf are to complete in order to be accepted into the fort!
However I could use some more ideas, these are the ones I got so far:
-Survive the slowly filling drowning chamber of dooom! (helps them learn swimming too)
-Survive a year in the caves using only hunting to gather food and only water to drink!
-Defeat a viscous beast with their bare hands!
So, does anyone have some more ideas, or maybe tried doing something similar before?

[Elifre]

Lock them in a Project SPARTAN chamber for a few years, or until they don't care about anything anymore.

The survivors will become horribly scarred killing machines who don't give a damn if everyone they know dies and remains unburied.

[Vilhelm]

Lock them in a Project SPARTAN chamber for a few years, or until they don't care about anything anymore.

The survivors will become horribly scarred killing machines who don't give a damn if everyone they know dies and remains unburied.

Now that is a good idea! 

[Greiger]

Lock the migants in a pit with food and a well when they arrive.   Throw some weapons down there (the weaponsmith's rejects, keep yer good stuff for your dwarves.) and put the migrants in their own squads. Place the bottom of a nonlethal dodge this trap down there. 

Goblins fall into the room full of barely armed migrant dwarves.  The dwarves fight for their freedom, any dwarf that gets a kill on a goblin is allowed inside the fortress.  Any dwarf that dies fighting makes the others more hardened.  Make sure the entire chamber can be sanitized in case a goblin spy is found.

[Elifre]

Thanks. ^^

I'm actually planning on setting up a system like this soon-ish. It'll take maybe forty-fifty chambers, which will require the following resources (assuming fifty chambers and three years per dwarf, based on my current setup):

Food:
Lavish prepared meals, preferably four or five types. Higher quality is better. 24 per chamber, 1200 total.
Whatever booze the dwarf prefers if possible, otherwise four types is ideal. 48 per chamber, 2400 total.
Barrels / Large Rock Pots: At least 100. More being better.

Nest boxes / turkeys:
A few gobblers outside the chambers.
2-3 Hens per chamber. Poults from unused chambers can be tossed in from above to ensure fighting. 100-150 hens total.
At least 50 nest boxes, 1 for each chamber. More if you want a higher rate of poult production.

Furniture (make the size cover the entire chamber before statues are added, and assign it to the dwarf):
1 bed per chamber, higher quality being better. 50 total.
1 chair per chamber, higher quality being better. 50 total. Make this a study.
1 table per chamber, blah blah blah. 50 total. Private dining room.
5-20 statues per chamber, preferably gold. Enough to make sure the dwarves are ecstatic while in said chambers. Assign one as a private statue garden.

To cover supply issues, you'll need to assign a garbage zone over the chamber surrounding an open space. Dwarves will toss in food and booze when ordered to dump them. Make sure you unforbid said supplies after they're tossed in, and have the area under the pit designated as a food stockpile to prevent rotting. It's best to only have one chamber supplied at a time. You'll also need a -massive- farm setup, with dedicated farmers, cooks, and brewers.

I hope that helps you out!

[Vilhelm]

Thanks. ^^

I'm actually planning on setting up a system like this soon-ish. It'll take maybe forty-fifty chambers, which will require the following resources (assuming fifty chambers and three years per dwarf, based on my current setup):

Food:
Lavish prepared meals, preferably four or five types. Higher quality is better. 24 per chamber, 1200 total.
Whatever booze the dwarf prefers if possible, otherwise four types is ideal. 48 per chamber, 2400 total.
Barrels / Large Rock Pots: At least 100. More being better.

Nest boxes / turkeys:
A few gobblers outside the chambers.
2-3 Hens per chamber. Poults from unused chambers can be tossed in from above to ensure fighting. 100-150 hens total.
At least 50 nest boxes, 1 for each chamber. More if you want a higher rate of poult production.

Furniture (make the size cover the entire chamber before statues are added, and assign it to the dwarf):
1 bed per chamber, higher quality being better. 50 total.
1 chair per chamber, higher quality being better. 50 total. Make this a study.
1 table per chamber, blah blah blah. 50 total. Private dining room.
5-20 statues per chamber, preferably gold. Enough to make sure the dwarves are ecstatic while in said chambers. Assign one as a private statue garden.

To cover supply issues, you'll need to assign a garbage zone over the chamber surrounding an open space. Dwarves will toss in food and booze when ordered to dump them. Make sure you unforbid said supplies after they're tossed in, and have the area under the pit designated as a food stockpile to prevent rotting. It's best to only have one chamber supplied at a time. You'll also need a -massive- farm setup, with dedicated farmers, cooks, and brewers.

I hope that helps you out!

This design sounds great, I might just build some of these chambers for myself. However why do you want them happy? What happened to the plan of turning everyone into horribly scarred killing machines? 
In my chambers I will only put only a well, a butchers shop, a kitchen and a monster that they have to kill with their bare fists in order to get meat to eat, with more thrown in when needed. Much less work, much more FUN

[Elifre]

Happy Dwarves means rather unhappy nobles.

Besides, this is based off of my chambers for two year olds. It's a combination play pen / death pit. You could give them equipment and wait until they berserk from unhappiness, though. They'd become a useful weapon, albeit an unpredictable one.

[Loud Whispers]

REMOVE ZE EYEBALLS! IT IS ZE ONLY WAY TO BE SURE!

[Elifre]

REMOVE ZE EYEBALLS! IT IS ZE ONLY WAY TO BE SURE!

Hmm... but how will we train the death turkeys to attack the eyes of their victims?

[Loud Whispers]

REMOVE ZE EYEBALLS! IT IS ZE ONLY WAY TO BE SURE!

Hmm... but how will we train the death turkeys to attack the eyes of their victims?

Feed them the eyes

[wierd]

But turkeys don't eat!?

[Pokon]

A dwarf who wishes to become a actual honered member of the fort must prove himself by dipping his beard in molten iron.

[Jimmy T. Malice]

Any dwarf whose beard is set on fire by this is kicked out for being a lily-livered elf.

[HorridOwn4ge]

TEST YOUR MIGHT anyone?

[wierd]

MK Announcer voice: "FINISH HIM!"
MK Announcer voice: "FATALITY!"
MK Announcer voice: "Turkey--WINS!"