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[Euld]

I'm ready to admit it to myself.  I have oral communication problems, and I'm not sure why.  So I ask you, fellow members of Bay 12, has anyone else had this sort of problem, and what ways did you manage to overcome it or deal with it?

[Muz]

I do, and still do. Mostly with strangers. But I have no problem communicating in text. So what I do is when I want to reply to a post or something, I try to reply to it out loud before typing.

Smiling a lot works too. Train yourself to force a smile in front of people. Chatroulette is a great place to practice, as you see real people and get annoyed enough that you don't feel like smiling, but there's actually enough incentive to smile. If you smile in front of people, they get more relaxed and it's a lot easier to communicate with them.

[Criptfeind]

Criptfeind's patented three step program to personal communication.

1: Be a direct descendent of the Norse giants.

2: Frown in a thoughtful yet anger manner well looking (physically) down on people.

3: Grunt noncommittally then frown harder and mumble when asked what you just said.

I do this for every conversation I have ever had, and I have not listened to a single issue.

[Euld]

I have issues talking in front of crowds or in front of class (stage fright, pretty much) and with explaining ideas, especially video game ideas.  I can handle strangers, heck, I practically love talking to random strangers.  There's no commitment, there's no worries about them meeting you a second time.  It feels much easier than establishing and maintaining lasting relationships or trying to convey vague ideas to a million pairs of eyes.

[Valid_Dark]

I'm a silver tongue by nature.

[Montague]

Talking in front of crowds gets easier with practice. Just put your body laungauge and gesturing on lock-down and focus on going from one idea to another. The less animated you are, the less you are actually emotionally engaged and the less the situation will really get to you. It has a calming effect, if a little counterintutive if you like to gesture a lot and make facial expressions when normally talking to folks. Also, be loud, speak up. Yell at them. So even if your gripped with absolute terror on the inside, it won't be apparent on the outside, you'll just be a guy standing there talking to the crowd.

 I use 3x5 index cards with the basic points I need to present on them in bullet format. Look around and direct your speech to and from the few people actually looking at you, then it's sort just like talking to one person at a time. After doing this a while it gets really easy to get up do more free-flowing speechs without too much apprehension.

Keep in mind, nobody really gives a damn about what you are saying, the majority are just as bored, disinterested and disengauged as you are listening to their lame presentations. There isn't any reason to be nervous or worried about messing up. Try aiming for boring presentations at first, I'll only help you out with disengauging the audience.

On my campus, people would stand in the commons in between classes and give speechs or recite from a book to the people passing by or sitting around studying, speechs to nobody in particular, just a guy yelling everyone is trying to ignore. That'd be decent practice.

[King DZA]

I recommend not giving a fuck. Hell, embrace it. I'm sure it makes having a conversation with you an unforgettable and unique experience.

[LordBucket]

oral communication problems

has anyone else had this sort of problem

No. I know nothing about having oral communications problems. I can't help you with that.

But...if you want to know about being good at communicating orally, that's something I know a great deal about and can probably help you with.

Would you provide a context? What's the situation? Are we talking about delivering impromptu speeches on stage in front of tens of thousands of people? Or maybe it's expressing feelings to a girlfriend? Are you asking how to convince people to see things your way? Do you want help learning how to engage casual acquaintences in idle conversation? Merely being able to be comfortable at a party? Are we talking about overcoming fear when starting conversations with strangers?

Advice that might be very useful in one context might be useless in another.

What specific circumstances do you want help with?

[Duke 2.0]

I have issues talking in front of crowds or in front of class (stage fright, pretty much) and with explaining ideas, especially video game ideas.  I can handle strangers, heck, I practically love talking to random strangers.  There's no commitment, there's no worries about them meeting you a second time.  It feels much easier than establishing and maintaining lasting relationships or trying to convey vague ideas to a million pairs of eyes.

Preachin' to the choir man.

 There are many approaches to take here, but I would probably suggest looking into communication classes for electives in college. Interpersonal communication classes can really help you better understand how it all works. Group communication classes also provides methods of organizing your thoughts and allowing you to pump them out.

 If you can talk to an adviser you might be able to get help from the institution itself with counseling services.

 I don't think any of us are communication majors, so whatever crummy advice we give probably won't help unless we have worked with counselors over this stuff(Like I have, but it was so long ago I forgot what they did). My own personal crummy advice is getting practice through friends. Find people who know what you are dealing with(Or inform people that care of what you are dealing with) and find excuses for speaking to many of them at once.

 If you have a mic I could offer some help. Start up a conversation online with multiple buddies where their faces are hidden beneath a list of names. Much easier to address such a crowd.

[LordBucket]

I have issues talking in front of crowds or
in front of class (stage fright, pretty much)

In my experience, stage fright, once learned, tends to not go away. It is, however, much like getting into cold water. The anticipation is usually much worse than the event itself. Sitting in your desk for 20 minutes...waiting and dreading for the teacher to call on you...the growing fear each time one student delivers a presentation, knowing that sooner or later it will be your turn...that anticipation is much worse than the speaking itself.

Once you jump into the pool the anticipation is gone. Once you get up and start speaking, the anticipation is gone. There's no more reason to dread or anticipate it.

Simple solution: ask to go first. In this way you minimize the time spent dreading the future. This also promotes learning to dread it less, since experience will be a short period of anticipation and dread rather than a long one. It's easier to be less afraid of something that's painful for a short while than something that's painful for a long time. Minimize the time you spend waiting to speak.

On stage rather than in a classroom, this usually isn't an option. But as a simple, practical matter...one can choose to avoid situations where one is likely to go on stage.

and with explaining ideas

In my experience, this is usually that the person doing the explaining doesn't understand what they're explaining as well as they think they do.

trying to convey vague ideas to a million pairs of eyes.

Exactly. If the idea is vague to you, then that lack of clarity is likely to come through in your expression. It's sometimes easier to do than to know or explain. Anyone can turn on a light switch. But that ability does not indicate sufficient familiarity to explain why a light switch works.

Simple solution: clarify to yourself in advance what it is you'll be explaining. Sit down in a quiet room and explain to yourself out loud, in full detail, how whatever it is you'll be explaining works. Pretend that you know nothing about what you're explaining, and go through the act of explaining to yoruself. Ask yoruself questions. Don't allow yourself to fall back on personal experience as shortcuts in the process.

[Truean]

http://www.toastmasters.org/ Helps....

[Loud Whispers]

I recommend not giving a fuck. Hell, embrace it. I'm sure it makes having a conversation with you an unforgettable and unique experience.

This is seriously a legit. life philosophy, and hell, does it actually work? YEP.

[King DZA]

It's true. The ancient technique of not giving a fuck can greatly ease most(if not all) of the troubles of the body, mind, and soul. I know for a fact my life would be much more unpleasant had I not become such an adept at it long ago.

[Leatra]

I had this problem too.

If the person I'm talking to is confident, I became more anxious.
If the person I'm talking to is shy, I became less anxious.
If I'm talking to someone from the opposite sex who I kinda like, I became anxious and even sometimes stutter.

Then I embraced the ancient 'not giving a fuck' philosophy like others mentioned. I just talk according to the mood of the person I'm talking to. People get anxious while talking to other people because they always think things like "how do I come off to these people" and "I should choose my every word very carefully"

You shouldn't think about that. Just relax and talk with your heart. I know this is difficult. I still become a little anxious sometimes but it's the best solution. 'how do I come off?' way of thinking is the source of most communication problems. Just don't give a fuck. If you must come off friendly, simply smile. Smiling to a total stranger is the best way to pull off a first impression.

I totally agree with LordBucket about stage fright. Once you start talking, crack a few jokes, make some points, everything becomes easier. More you think about it, it becomes more frightning. It's good to do some speech rehearsals until you get used to the feeling but don't overdo it. I had this problem when I was in my school's theatre. My role wasn't big but it was still scary. We did the same play for like 20 times and I was only anxious for the first few times.

[Alhash]

Well, if your communication problems persist,, the only solution is to live in a remote cabin in Montana - go insane and be a eco-terrorist then build wooden bombs and send them to people in the mail! Hey, this guy did it and he's famous now! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unabomber

Seriously though, I have this problem. Although more so with strangers and crowds. What I suggest is just relax, make a little small talk, break the ice as much as you can. Smile a lot, but try not to smile like your about to put a roofie in their drink. Sit or stand in a comfortable position, occupy yourself, and example is if you smoke - smoke whilst talking (unless they have a problem with it). It helps get your mind off screwing up. And as said previously - try not to give two shits. Difficult as it can be, but just think to yourself 'Hey, if they don't like how I communicate, they can go fuck off'. Simple as that. As for dealing with crowds, that I can't help with, I avoid crowds like the Bubonic Plague, TBH.