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Author Topic: My dwarves are pussies  (Read 2071 times)

raptorfangamer

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Re: My dwarves are pussies
« Reply #15 on: January 06, 2012, 03:58:32 pm »

I guess you have a new mayor!

and urist McBadass will reign with a hand of cat bone! because you ran out of iron...
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bombzero

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Re: My dwarves are pussies
« Reply #16 on: January 06, 2012, 06:14:09 pm »

yeah, one time i had a FB attack from the 2nd cavern and my hammerer who got * accidentally* locked out there with his adamantine hammer got into a year long battle with him until i opened the door and my recruit speardwarf strolls out and stabs the thing in the head.
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Kofthefens

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Re: My dwarves are pussies
« Reply #17 on: January 07, 2012, 12:24:48 am »

Wait wait wait, sorry for double post but this deserves it.

Urist McSheriff, who's also my hunter, was actually the one who ended the reign of terror. I just looked at the thing and it was covered in a pool of its own blood, and I had a hunting (not combat, HUNTING report)

I check it and fine that it took him two shots to kill the thing that had been terrorizing my fortress for the past four ingame months.

"The flying +Turkey Bone Bolt+ strikes the Forgotten Beast in the right front leg, tearing the muscle and fracturing the bone!
 The Forgotten Beast falls over!
 The flying +Turkey Bone Bolt+ strikes the Forgotten Beast in the upper body, tearing the muscle and tearing the heart!"

It's official, McSheriff is now the most badass dwarf I've had in a while, especially because hunting is a civilian profession, meaning he did it without getting scared off or being told to do so. In fact, he didn't even consider it "combat", but just another animal to hunt.

Damn. I got here too late. In the future, you can always blind your dwarves!
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Lordraymond

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Re: My dwarves are pussies
« Reply #18 on: January 07, 2012, 05:15:22 am »

It should also be noted that the thing breathed fire on a single child, the child of the sheriff, and killed him before the beast died. The sheriff flew into a fit of rage and kicked a cat in the toe, and as soon as I had my fortress guard established one took him into the back room and killed him with a single punch to the face, through his iron helmet. So dies a great hero of Crimsonhold

On the bright side, a few months ago, one of my mass-produced nickel statues (I accidentally all the garnierite) turned out to be of none other than Ideb Uristalbuls, Sheriff, striking down the forgotten beast! It's now proudly standing in my main hall.
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Oliolli

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Re: My dwarves are pussies
« Reply #19 on: January 07, 2012, 08:12:01 am »

The statue should be in his tomb.
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gazoko

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Re: My dwarves are pussies
« Reply #20 on: January 08, 2012, 02:44:59 pm »

I would have suggested digging above it and dumping barrels of booze into the area it was trapped and sending every dwarf you didn't care about in to bitchslap it and hope it dies in a wonderful boozesplosion but I guess that isn't too dwarfy...

*Urist Mcslapyourshit scratches the forgotten beast in the left toenail, the attack glances away!*
*Forgotten beast breathes fire, Urist Mc.slapyourshit is melting! Urist Mc.slapyourshit has been struck down!*
*Commence instant vaporisation of forgotten beast*
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