Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[vonFaust]

I'm guessing I cant trade wooden things to Elves. Yet they can trade them to me, eh? These Elves will die next year.

[NecroRebel]

And now you know why elves suck.

Even more irritatingly, if you purchase a wooden object from the elves, then immediately attempt to sell it back to them without even closing out the trade screen, they'll still get pissed 

[Tevish Szat]

I thankfully went into trading with the elves warned, and have so far not (accidentally) offended them.  I imagine if I had, I'd be more willing in general to trade them a nice hot cup of murder... or something else starting with an "m".

[King DZA]

I thankfully went into trading with the elves warned, and have so far not (accidentally) offended them.  I imagine if I had, I'd be more willing in general to trade them a nice hot cup of murder... or something else starting with an "m".

Martini?

Macaroni?

Mixed nuts?

[AWellTrainedFerret]

Elves love wood. Wood is flammable. The solution is obvious.

[vonFaust]

Elves love wood. Wood is flammable. The solution is obvious.

Well, so are elves, and I suspect setting them on fire would feel more rewarding. Besides, I've gotta use that wood for my baubles.

[Lordraymond]

Why stop with using their wood for crafts? Use the elves themselves! Elves can be made into a variety of wonderful objects for use around your fort such as:

-Pancakes! Your Dwarves love food, and some nicely compacted elf-patties can please their rumbly tummies! Just place the elves under a bridge, pull lever, and wait several seconds for results.
-Deli Meats! Just give a few Dwarves your best candy-swords and send them to do their work! Works great for all your kids' lunches!
-Pincushions! Liberal application of bolts is all it takes for some lovely Elven pincushions! Bonus points if the bolts are made out of wood, I hear they love the stuff!
-Dog chow! With some proper preparation, dropping a few into your dog kennels will lead to a lovely supply of food, and if you drop them from high enough you get a red paint job to go along with it!
-!!Subjects!!! Elves love science, especially nature science! They'll be happy to be the test subject for what happens upon dropping a live creature in a room with an enraged giant badger!
-Decorations! Hang 'em on spikes, blades, whatever! They'll make great seasonal decorations for any time of year!
-Magma Sponges! I'll let Necro explain this one...

[ASCIt]

And they screw with you, too. Like if, say, you get this really great goblin christmas, but there are some things you don't care for, so you try to sell them. Then you find out that they're decorated with glumprong or something, and the elves freak out.

[proxn_punkd]

And they screw with you, too. Like if, say, you get this really great goblin christmas, but there are some things you don't care for, so you try to sell them. Then you find out that they're decorated with glumprong or something, and the elves freak out.

This is why I only sell the elves stuff made in-house from elf-safe materials, and save Goblin Christmas presents for humans and other dwarves.

Shut up, it's totally worth it. They bring me bears and giant badgers in exchange for a little micromanaging. It's not that bad.

[AWellTrainedFerret]

And they screw with you, too. Like if, say, you get this really great goblin christmas, but there are some things you don't care for, so you try to sell them. Then you find out that they're decorated with glumprong or something, and the elves freak out.

This is why I only sell the elves stuff made in-house from elf-safe materials, and save Goblin Christmas presents for humans and other dwarves.

Shut up, it's totally worth it. They bring me bears and giant badgers in exchange for a little micromanaging. It's not that bad.

They bring me cool animals too; except when I trade with them all they get in return are wooden bolts at high velocity.

[Ifeno]

The only reasonable currency is axe to the face.  Unless they bring nice tigers.  Then get 50 war tigers, lions, cheetah, and cougars first.  THEN slaughter hem all