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[Truean]

My mom was at a wedding for a girl who works in her office. She got drunk and told her immediate supervisor (and I quote), "fuck you Bob."

 

I don't think she ever apologized. I just kept silently horrified.

She got mad at me the next day for asking her what the hell she was doing. I mean really? What the hell? I told her to stay away from the female coworker who somehow convinced her (sauced) to do it. This of course made her mad and I could care less, because she's gonna get herself fired telling her boss that kinda stuff.... I mean damn how are you even arguing against me here...?

Naturally:
They transferred her to a different plant on the other side of town, which she hates but frankly is lucky to be at, period. This plant might be closing in 6 months as both this plant and her old one were bought by a larger company and they are consolidating. Its finally sinking into her head that she's in some trouble and heck I'm amazed she's made it this long after that comment. I'm thinking when they consolidate these two plants she won't make the cut and I can just imagine why....

I'm thinking if they fire her or terminate her employment as part of the consolidation I can get her unemployment benefits, etc.
I'm more worried about counseling and the fact that she's slipping. This is not just an isolated incident and I think she might get worse. Naturally, "there's nothing wrong" with her...

Not entirely sure what to do here. Mom being unemployed will suck, clearly and without saying. I'm more worried about the reason she's unemployed, her mind is slipping.... Shit....

Ideas?

[Vector]

I wouldn't necessarily assume poor mental health.  I'd assume stress -> drinking -> lowered inhibitions to alleviating said stress, and that in some sense that was what she really did want to do.  She knows that she did "the wrong thing" already, or at least the unpopular thing, and doesn't need you to tell her.  What she needs is support--not necessarily physical, but emotional.

Or, better yet, you could start working harder at doing little things for her, and seeing if your relationship doesn't change a little.  She's really the one you need to talk to, so it's up to you to open communication lines and experiment.

[Kearn]

a sad attempt at coherent word things

[Truean]

Well, it's up to her if she really wants to keep her job. I suggest she attempt to apologize and see if she can work off the insult and explain why she really offended him like that.

Well, to the extent that people who don't work don't eat it's up to her.... As for apologizing I think she's burned that bridge.

I wouldn't necessarily assume poor mental health.  I'd assume stress -> drinking -> lowered inhibitions to alleviating said stress, and that in some sense that was what she really did want to do.  She knows that she did "the wrong thing" already, or at least the unpopular thing, and doesn't need you to tell her.  What she needs is support--not necessarily physical, but emotional.

Or, better yet, you could start working harder at doing little things for her, and seeing if your relationship doesn't change a little.  She's really the one you need to talk to, so it's up to you to open communication lines and experiment.

Well yes and I get that to a point. I would assume poor mental health though because she keeps doing this shit and drinking a lot (substance abuse). When you start telling your boss to fuck off and loosing your job, you have a drinking problem. She drinks a lot, always has. If she says that to her boss's face, imagine what she says to me.... If I didn't care, I'd be gone, justifiably. I'm still here.

She needs to stop drinking so damn much before she looses whatever she has. That's about the only way I know how to put it.

[Vector]

Hmm, I think I understand, then--or at least a little bit better.

So now we know it's a drinking problem.  I'd suggest, as I did before, working on your relationship with your mother until you have enough leverage to convince her that she might need help (or subtly suggest that she not drink when inappropriate, perhaps by offering another activity that makes drinking impossible or would make the activity significantly less pleasurable).  Alternatively, working on the relationship might in and of itself shore her up enough to improve the situation.

Seriously, this is the only thing I can think of.  It's worked for me, so maybe it'll work for you.