Topic: Bacon Tree (Read 439 times)

Girlinhat · « **on:** February 16, 2011, 05:03:08 am »

(Also posted on dwarf mode forums, because I feel both sets of people will appreciate this.)

As usual, I was sitting around watching my dwarves go about their daily lives. They ran from groundhogs, they admired fine doors, they stood on tables, and they refused to wipe their feet as they walked anywhere. Then lo, my farmer because preoccupied, and goes On Break for the better part of a year. The food supplies, never having been amazing, were depleted quickly, and the citizens resorted to picking bushes like common elves and butchering animals for their meat.

Dear Urist, my most faithful of stone haulers, stopped then, turned to the heavens and said, "Ey you! We're busting our asses down here building this tower out of pure charcoal and falling down starving on ornate gold floors. We're doing all this for you, the least you could do is provide us with some bacon!"

And I, in my infinite wisdom, replied, "You would only weaponize it and hurt yourself... not that it matters, because I was going to do this anyways. It was totally my idea that I had before you said it now shut up you're going in the danger room naked!"

One tantrum spiral and perversion of nature later, and the bacon tree was born. This is a majestic thing of beauty, modest in design but unparalleled in use and value. They're native to tropical regions, such as tropical savannas, shrublands, forests, and other very warm climates, where its fruit can easily crisp in the hot sun. Bacon doesn't cook on a glacier, now does it? They occur with reliable frequency, easily visible by their thin, golden brown branches and strips of fried delicious fruit. Understandably, the consumption of bacon yields no seeds, nor is it possible to brew into alcohol, but this Armok-blessed fruit is edible straight off the branches and cookable into any meal!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I shit you not, a bacon tree. Although, not really a tree, the game classifies it as a "shrub". It's harvested by a herbalist, produces no seeds, so it's only gathered in the wild and not cultivated (although this can easily be changed as desired) or brewed into alcohol, processed into vial or barrel, or anything like that, but it can be cooked into a meal. They occur in any tropical region, again easily mod-able, are generally pointless except for novelty value. But admit it, you love it...

This is made to use with Mayday's graphics, so the appearance may not fit perfectly for all graphic styles.

Just add the previously spoiled code into plant_standard.txt and gen a new world. Sorry, won't work in an existing world (probably).

Rowanas · « **Reply #1 on:** February 16, 2011, 12:31:17 pm »

I call for a Nobel Prize for this man!

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Author Topic: Bacon Tree (Read 439 times)

Girlinhat

Bacon Tree

Rowanas

Re: Bacon Tree