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[Duuvian]

Hello. I found this ad on craigslist in my daily search for jobs (and craigslist prostitutes [just kidding, they took that off their site a long time ago])

http://detroit.craigslist.org/okl/med/2096760386.html

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Rappers - Producers - Singers - Beat Makers (Southfield, MI)
Date: 2010-12-05, 4:14PM EST
Reply to: job-mskvp-2096760386@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

Attentions Writers – Producers - Rappers :

The piece we are putting together is hard hitting. It has the energy of "The Zoo", caged spirits that are fighting to be freed. The sound is industrial, warrioristic, and HARD! Attached you will find a list of business terms and definitions. The list is for reference. Feel free to use the terms, definitions, or the concepts associated with them in your writing. The piece is 100% positive. We are focused on the concepts of:

1. Parents teaching children business
2. Children in business
3. Good Credit
4. Family and Community doing well due to us doing good business.
5. Other positives that come from entrepreneurship.
6. Long term planning

Be careful not to make references to jail, death, killing, the streets, race, religion, drugs, or anything that would not cross the lines of social difference except for the lines we intend to cross. The specifications outlined here are not to limit creativity. These specifications are to establish the framework for the music we are creating.

Happy creating,

It has the energy of "The Zoo", caged spirits that are fighting to be freed.
1. Parents teaching children business
2. Children in business
3. Good Credit

Anyone else find this as hilarious as I do?

EDIT: The good credit thing hints that it's a bank. The lyrics could be about robbing a bank without harming anyone, escaping in a helicopter so you aren't on the streets, never mention being caught or prison, and your family having mysteriously good credit for the initial investment on your child's new business.

[Duuvian]

I wrote lyrics and sent them in. It's likely the best rap involving credit scores I've ever written.

EDIT: It was about spending all your money to get a high credit score and using it to take out a large loan and using said loan to somehow get a helicopter and fly your family away without re-paying the loan. The chorus was basically advice to independently invest, suggested by children threatened by whipping (with whip-ses) if they don't learn their business options.

It would be quite the radio jingle.

[filiusenox]

That's funny. A hard rock industrailtic bank commercial is what I find funniest.

[Duuvian]

I think it's this guy:

http://www.authorcollective.com/Tony_Dorian.html

If anyone is interested, please contact him. I am currently hinting that compensation for my time is welcome as I can do 'portfolio pieces' on my own with more awesome guidelines. If it's not the case that he's making a profit off my volunteer work it's not a terrible cause I suppose, to help people who might not understand how the system can be manipulated to their benefit if you are willing to be manipulated in your own way. In other words, business and loans.

If I am mistaken or am somehow causing a problem/breaking a law inadvertently, keep in mind I will edit this post to resolve this problem upon being notified. Note that this post's tertiary goal is to actually help him out.

EDIT: Hope it's not this guy: http://www.myspace.com/dorian_916

Spoiler: ? (click to show/hide)

The Business Babies® program information is communicated with aggressively priced interactive entrepreneurship initiatives.

I like this guy. He means cheap.

Someone should buy one for Nikov's baby.