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[Fniff]

I remember thinking a while ago, what would happen if fantasy movies/games/books came into the modern age.

I then thought about what would happen if Dwarf Fortress came into the modern age.

I then thought what would happen if someone found a fortress that reached the hidden fun stuff.

This is the story that came of that.

Warning: May be wrong and/or spoiler-heavy.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

AN: This takes place a long time after the dwarf fortresses. Humanity, dwarves and kobolds (Goblins and elves were killed after a world war, which everyone was happy for and the day the last elves died was a international holiday) have become amazingly advanced, almost as advanced as us, using only water as a power-source.This takes place in the corner of the map, a sinister tundra where the dwarves have set up research outposts.
2010, The Antarctic. Moonstone 12 Early Winter

"Research Outpost Alpha, do you copy?" Johnny asked on the radio. He was in Research Outpost Beta. For some stupid reason, Johnny was the only one in his base. ROA was one of the only areas that was near enough for radio contact, ever since Research Outpost Centauri was gone.

"Yeah, we copy. Listen, you won't fucking believe this! We found something, deep in the ice! We took a piece of rock off it, and it must be at least a thousand years old!" Harry, ROA's commander said.

Johnny straightened up in his chair, then took a swig of some whiskey. He felt the warmth returning to his body.

"Really? That's amazing! That must have been the time around...The first fucking dwarf fortresses being set up! Wow, you found a dwarf fortress! Is it OK?" He said, excited.

"Yeah! It was preserved perfectly! It must have been a thousand years since this fortress actually saw the light!" Harry gasped. A dwarf fortress, fully preserved! Johnny could see why Harry was gasping.

"OK, we managed to open the doors... Wow, this place is engraved! OK, the first one depicts 7 dwarfs cracking open a mountain. The others just show the development of the fortress, immigrants, caravans, etc... Huh." Harry suddenly had a lot of excitement drained out of his voice.

"The last engraving... It shows a dwarf... Looking down a hollow pit...And committing suicide." He muttered.

"OK, we are entering another room. This is a dining hall. On the roof, there is a bunch of engravings! Dwarfs having fun, dwarves drinking, dwarves eating. Wow, most dwarf fortresses have really fucking disgusting dining halls, remember Boat-murdered?" Johnny shuddered. Boat-murdered was fucked up.

"Anyway, heading into another room... Oh Gods. It appears there was a wall where the doorway is, but the wall was knocked down. The room is covered with engravings. Dwarves being murdered by... Horrifying creatures. One shows a skinless eyeless huge fly...Raping a dwarf woman. OK, and Jill just vomited. Urist too. Also, there is a dead body next to an engraving with a engraver engraving the dwarves words for "Not going to survive. Committing suicide. I am so sorry. If you find this, get the fuck out of here."..." Johnny heard Harry cry a bit.

"Moving...Moving on, there is a wall here...Well, a broken one. OK... This appears to be a bunch of rooms, such as bedrooms, carpenters, masons... Most of the rooms have dead dwarves in them. All aren't as lucky as the engraver. All are brutally murdered."

"Well, we found something. Appears to be a mine. It goes down deep... Now this is odd. It's an eerie cavern. It's lit up by purple light. There seems to be bottomless pits everywhere and it seems to go on for ages..." Suddenly, Johnny heard a massive amount of screaming.

"OH SHIT! OH SHIT! WHAT THE FUCK ARE THESE THINGS! OH GODS RUN RUN RUN!" Harry screamed.

Suddenly, there was the sound of flapping wings, and Johnny heard the radio being dropped.

"AGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa" Harry's screams slowly drifted away, and Johnny heard the sounds of munching.

Johnny remembered the tales of hidden fun stuff, and how they led to horrifying demons, and monsters. He also remembered about how many dwarf fortresses were destroyed by the hidden fun stuff, and how afterwards, the demons would wreck havoc on the surface.

Johnny grabbed his radio.

"This is Beta broadcasting on an open channel. Alpha is gone. Please, can someone send a helicopter over here to bring a bunch of concrete, to seal up alpha outpost? Yeah, I know you spent a fuckton of money on it, but seriously, it's not worth it. Beta out." Johnny noticed two giant dark figures in the distance.

This was going to be a long night.

Hope you like it, and I might make a sequel. Or a prequel, even.

[andfhe]

I DEMAND that they use booze instead of water as a power source.

[Fniff]

I DEMAND that they use booze instead of water as a power source.

But then, wouldn't they just drink it and then run out of power?

Anyway, you can make bloody fluid logic computers, so using water as a power source is just dandy.

[andfhe]

But they're DWARVES! What kind of Dwarf doesn't use booze for everything?

[Fniff]

But they're DWARVES! What kind of Dwarf doesn't use booze for everything?

OK, how about this.

One dwarf fortress, when water was just being used as a power source, decided that booze would work too. Sadly, they went completely and utterly insane because they didn't have any booze to spare, and thus, caused a temper spiral that ended up killing the entire fortress.

See? No one wanted to use booze for power after that.

[andfhe]

But what kind of Dwarf wouldn't have an excessive supply of booze to last them years?

[Fniff]

But what kind of Dwarf wouldn't have an excessive supply of booze to last them years?

Well, one who is on the far side of the map, on an area which is utterly terrifying and some idiot didn't actually fill out an entire supply of alcohol so now he only has enough to last half a year!

That kind.

[Scaraban]

nice