Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[Rysith]

long term relationships are stupid until your life is stable (ie after college/military/whatever and you have a decent job that you're fairly certain you'll keep for a while) until then 2 months sounds about as long as a relationship *should* last

I'd strongly disagree. You aren't going to figure out what you want in a relationship (long-term or otherwise) your first time trying it, and there are a lot of things that don't come up in the first two months. I agree that relationships shouldn't be final or cause overmuch drama (though they will), but saying that any particular relationship (or class of relationships) *should* last some amount of time is looking at it wrong. Relationships should last as long as all participants feel that they are worth it, whether that's two days, two months, two years, whatever.

[Renault]

Relationships should last as long as all participants feel that they are worth it, whether that's two days, two months, two years, whatever.

Ultimately, that's really the most important thing said thus far. All the seems to mostly be peoples own tastes in relationship proclaimed as if it was a universal truth. There is no intrinic "right" length for relationships, no matter what your age or status. Every relationship is unique, from a one-night stand to a long-term marriage, and its really not a good idea to set artificial timetables based off of other peoples ideas about what you should be doing at the point you're at in your life.

[Grakelin]

So, apparently from what I'm reading from this forum, and from what I've experienced in life:

I should use girls and not focus at a long-term relationship at all during high-school.

Is this the gist of it?

No. Not every girl wants to be in a long-term relationship. It is all well and good to take a strong moral stand about something, but this one in particular actually demeans women as two-dimensional figures who all want the same sort of relationship. Trust me when I say that you will not have a great deal of trouble finding girls who are interested in having a fun, laid-back relationship. This is something you should be clear about.

Nobody is telling anybody to go rape women or emotionally abuse them. If you are a woman who feels as though dating a man who likes to experience a variety of relationships is something you don't want to go through (not to single out anybody in this thread in particular), then you don't really have anything to worry about: A mature, responsible man will make it clear to you what he's looking for in a relationship, and you don't have to date him if you don't want to.

Again, let me agree wholeheartedly with what Bandages said: It takes two to tango. Pretending that the man gets to walk in, scoop up the woman, and have his way with her is a bad idea, and does not lend a healthy atmosphere to anybody. If the woman is not receptive to a relationship, then the couple is not actually dating. This is the same if the man is not receptive to a relationship. In both cases, it's just a little sad. If you're really so unaware of your partner's personality that it shocks you to find out what they're looking for in a relationship, you were either blinding yourself (I've done that before) or you're not actually their partner, and you're just getting ahead of yourself.

I also disagree with Chutney's statement that '2 months' is how long a relationship should last. The relationship should last until the couple isn't into it anymore. My last relationship lasted for a year, and it was a pretty good time. Two months is actually a very small amount of time. If the couple never gets to the point where they're unsatisfied with the relationship, then that's great. They win the love game.