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Author Topic: Modern Day Dwarf  (Read 1407 times)

Raneman

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Modern Day Dwarf
« on: January 07, 2010, 01:21:29 pm »

Urist logged on to his favorite site, and entered the chatroom.

murtleturtle: Hello. ASR?
sexehdorf1363: 44/f/dwarf
murtleturtle: Ooh, wanna come over and share some spores?
sexehdorf1363: K. I will b rite there.
sexehdorf1363 has quit.

Urist spun around in his recliner. After half an hour, there was a knock on the door. Urist opened it up, it was an obese male elf!

Urist slammed the door. He kicked a lever with his foot. The roar of a grizzly combined with the girly screams of an elf calmed him, he brought some of his crappy Dwarven rum out of his fridge, and sat to drank it. He probably wouldn't get in trouble for this, it was obviously the bear's fault.


MEANWHILE.

"McCaruso, sir! An elf has been found on the street with no clothes on and bear bites on him!"

  :)
Well, it looks like he...
 8)
couldn't bear it anymore.
YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

"McCaruso... we looked on the subjects computer, and..."

"Yeah, yeah. Send a decoy over."

1 hour later.

Urist heard a knock on the door, he opened it. A goblin stood there, with lipstick all over it's face and a wig on. "Hello, Mr. Urisst, me name isssss...issss.... M...m..mono... what this say?" The goblin handed Urist the paper. "It says Monola, it also says you're supposed to..." Urist walked out of the room, and came back in with a crossbow and nailed the goblin in the forehead.

To be continued.

Poll: Should Urist be caught or not? Should he survive?
« Last Edit: January 07, 2010, 04:40:26 pm by Raneman »
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thobal

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Re: Modern Day Dwarf
« Reply #1 on: January 07, 2010, 04:07:15 pm »

lol... continue.
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Raneman

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Re: Modern Day Dwarf
« Reply #2 on: January 07, 2010, 04:11:11 pm »

Added a poll.
« Last Edit: January 07, 2010, 04:17:01 pm by Raneman »
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piecewise

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Re: Modern Day Dwarf
« Reply #3 on: January 07, 2010, 05:18:43 pm »

Raneman

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Re: Modern Day Dwarf
« Reply #4 on: January 07, 2010, 05:44:01 pm »

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AussieGuy

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Re: Modern Day Dwarf
« Reply #5 on: January 07, 2010, 05:56:42 pm »

Added a poll.
no you didn't

Yes I did, learn to read.

No he thought you were going to add a poll by the add a poll button, not by writing it in. Don't need to be so defensive
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Chicken Launcher

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Re: Modern Day Dwarf
« Reply #6 on: January 07, 2010, 06:20:32 pm »

but you don't need to meet to share spores
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Tallefred

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Re: Modern Day Dwarf
« Reply #7 on: January 07, 2010, 08:24:23 pm »

"McCaruso, sir! An elf has been found on the street with no clothes on and bear bites on him!"

  :)
Well, it looks like he...
 8)
couldn't bear it anymore.
YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I LOVED this.
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Michael

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Re: Modern Day Dwarf
« Reply #8 on: January 08, 2010, 05:16:34 am »

Urist slammed the door. He kicked a lever with his foot. The roar of a grizzly combined with the girly screams of an elf calmed him,

Wouldn't the bear just ignore the elf, due to the AT_PEACE_WITH_WILDLIFE flag in raw/objects/entity_default.txt?
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Vester

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Re: Modern Day Dwarf
« Reply #9 on: January 08, 2010, 05:23:16 am »

Maybe

Maybe they're both screaming just for kicks?

Or maybe he removed it from the raws. ;D
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Deon

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Re: Modern Day Dwarf
« Reply #10 on: January 08, 2010, 05:54:45 am »

Obviously it was a russian bear, and they usually form entities and no longer are "natural".

P.S. Move it here: http://www.bay12games.com/forum/index.php?board=14.0
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Rip0k

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Re: Modern Day Dwarf
« Reply #11 on: January 08, 2010, 06:10:52 am »

If Urist is a modern dwarf shouldn't he use a shotgun or something more modern than crossbow?

Make him a Sheriff :D
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Deon

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Re: Modern Day Dwarf
« Reply #12 on: January 08, 2010, 07:03:53 am »

Crossbows are pretty much used still.

And anyway, even while there're shotguns, he can use crossbows only (due to the limits of the interface).
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Chandrasekhar

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Re: Modern Day Dwarf
« Reply #13 on: January 08, 2010, 04:23:16 pm »

If Urist is a modern dwarf shouldn't he use a shotgun or something more modern than crossbow?

Why downgrade?
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