Every now and then something interesting, weird, or funny happens in my fort. It's usually not enough for me to want to create a whole topic dedicated to it, so I'm going to use this one as a compilation of everything I get the impulse to write about that happens in Reinhammers.
Some quick facts:
At the time of the creation of this topic, Reinhammers is 16 years old (founded c. 235, currently 251) and is home to over 250 dwarves. Reinhammers, or 'Memadnil', is part of the kingdom of The Rampart of Symmetries ('Dishmab Shazak'). It is home to the king and his consort.
http://mkv25.net/dfma/map-3459-reinhammersI should also note that
this story probably belongs here, so if a mod wants to just copy it over as a post and delete the old topic it'd be downright nifty.
The stories I'll post aren't guaranteed to be chronologically connected or even in correct chronological order. Mostly they'll just be amusing anecdotes.
So, on to the first story...
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Excerpt 1: The Foolish Farmer
Iden Idemberul Shanthak Am, or 'Iden Keybastions the Familial Locks of Opening', First Marksdwarf and High Commander of the army of Reinhammers, bit into the camel-tallow roast and chewed thoughtfully. It was a day like any other, although there was a lot on her mind. The goblin sieges as of late had become increasingly impressive. This wasn't a problem because it posed any danger to the dwarves - indeed, even the newly-drafted rookie mace squad had done well this year, having slaughtered an entire unit of goblins by themselves. No, it was problem because so many goblins had been killed that hauling and sorting all of their equipment took up the better part of the following summer.
Oh well, she thought,
the bureaucrats can't fault my troops for doing their job properly.She was sitting on a small platform suspended over a system of water-filled canals. These were the famed 'underwater dining halls' of Reinhammers. Iden preferred to remain seated apart from the other dwarves - not because she didn't enjoy company, but because she spent so much time chatting and sparring in the barracks that a little peace and quiet every now and then was a blessing.
Suddenly a dwarf came barreling through the entryway from the main stairwell. She was covered in dust and filth and dressed in the clothes of a common farmer. Iden recognized her - she thought her name was Sibrek, though she couldn't be certain.
"ELF!"
A mild state of panic ensued. All of the dwarves that had been eating stood. Those who had weapons immediately drew them. A rumbling murmur of tension enveloped the dining hall.
Until Iden stood and raised a gauntleted hand. Her fabled presence immediately commanded silence. "Where is this elf?"
Sibrek wavered. "It's.. locked in the cage chambers, ma'm."
Iden arched a brow. She knew the elven prisoner of war they'd captured during the first siege by the point-ears had been kept in her cage for years without any trouble. "And how did the elf escape from its cage?"
There was a pause. The planter squeaked, "I was bringing one of the new marmots we've caught into the cage room. The elf asked me to bring it some water.. it just looked so.. so pathetic in there, with its beardless face and.."
"You let it go?" Iden growled.
"No, ma'm... it hit me upside the head with its bow and I ran away. But I managed to lock the door behind me.."
Immediately the entire room filled with laughter. Sibrek bowed her head. Iden permitted the dwarves to have their chuckle before silencing them again by clanging the butt of her axe on the dolomite floor. "You're lucky the elf didn't have any arrows or you wouldn't be standing here. I'll have to remember to have the fool who didn't take its weapon away put on goblin-watching duty for the next six months."
She turned to the two swordsdwarves who had been chatting at a table nearby. They were young, the newest conscripts to the army. They also both had at least one parent who had become a dwarven champion in the past, and were thus chosen to form the backbone of the fledgling sword squad. "Nish. Nil. Go take care of the elf. Whoever kills it will get a bonus on their next pay day."
The two dwarves grinned and ran towards the stairwell. Iden, meanwhile, gave a good long glare to the planter. "You're dismissed. Try not to take pity on anything that
eats its victims from now on, hm?"
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Nish and Nil ran up the stairwell they'd ascended so many times before, huffing and puffing eagerly as they neared the cage rooms. Nish was slightly taller and was the faster runner, but Nil was doing a good job of keeping up.
"You can bet I'm going to be the one to get that bonus," Nish called down to the female swordsdwarf.
"Loser shaves their beard off!" Nil returned, obviously feeling just as confident. It was a typical bet among young dwarven soldiers, and one that was generally frowned upon by their superiors.
"You're on," Nish agreed.
They both arrived at the doorway to the cage room in time to see the door burst open from the jamb. A bedraggled elf emerged, snarling curses and swinging her bow around wildly.
"Time to di--" Nil began.
But she was cut short by the elf, who attacked with the ferocity of a wild animal. Both dwarves and the elf traded a series of quick blows, but in the end it was Nil's sword that lopped the creature's head clean from its shoulders.
After catching her breath, Nil turned to Nish and grinned. "Guess I should start calling you 'baby-face', huh?"
Grumbling to himself, Nish stamped off. Nil cleaned her sword of filthy elven blood and followed him, savoring the thought of the pay bonus that awaited her.. not to mention the story she'd be able to tell in the barracks to the next batch of new recruits.
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Topic: Excerpts From the History of Reinhammers (Read 1311 times)