Sibrek stood on the rock salt platform before the wooden plank. In his strong arm he manhandled the Goblin Master Theif with ease.
"I'm overjoyed to see the completion of this pit, with it we can do away with criminals such as this - goblin - here" He finished with a sneer.
A dwarf raises his hand hesitently.
"B-but the pit isn't finn-"
Sibrek cheerfully cuts him off.
"Silence! don't even think about ruining this moment my robust companion." He raises his free arm with a flourish as the goblin struggles. "With your month of laborious digging we will do away with corruption in our moutain home!"
Manom the Sherif leaned in and whispered.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" He leans over and peaks down at the unfinished pit.
Sibrek Raises an eyebrow and with a carefree shove, propels the Goblin towards the gangplank. The goblin stumbles forward, cursing in frustration as he tries to regain his footing. With a boot to the back of the head he's proppeled forward into the pit. The crowd leans over the edge of the pit to see how well it worked. A moment of silence passes. As Sibrek fiddles with his hat the crowd starts hollering and booing.
"What is this!?"
"That Goblin barely bruised his knees!"
"We told you we weren't done!"
"We haven't even removed the access ramp at the far side yet!"
"Look! He's getting away!"
Manom urgently whistles and 3 wrestlers run around to the far side of the pit and meet the goblin. With another kick to the chest the goblin is knocked down into an even deeper corner of the hole.
"He still isn't dead!"
"This is an outrage!"
Sibrek flaps his arms trying to calm the crowd down. "ok! ok! pipe down, don't worry I'll handle this!" He turned and waves at a dwarf at the far side of the pit who begins to manually turn a screwpump next to the river. Sibrek turns to the crowd again.
"In proper dwarf fashion we always have a backup plan!" He gestures behind him "This goblin can't escape his watery doom now!"
The water was indeed being pumped into the pit, but the pit was too broad and the water poured in slowly from the screwpump. The goblin, (having his leg broken from the fall.) Begins to crawl for the ramp at the far side.
Sibrek starts getting angry. "Is that the fastest you can pump you lazy booze drinking lardass!?"
"You wanna come over here and do the pumping!?"
"I don't do manual labor, I'm the Mayor! You plump helmet eating sack of squirrel droppings! Now quit your complaining and pump faster!"
"No"
"NO?!"
"No need, the goblin ain't in the pit anymore."
Indeed the goblin had again ascended to the top of the pit by simply crawling. However the pit was quite close to the river which was in fact, overflowing, with carp. The goblin didn't stand a chance, aroused by the smell of blood, the 7lb carp leaped from the water and dragged the 118lb Goblin 5 feet across the ground. The Goblins attempts to stay on land by wrapping his arms around a sapling were futile against the fishes overpowering strength.
The dwarfs decided to abandon their pit and simply drop all future thieves into the river.
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Topic: Short Story: Sibreks Pit (Read 1287 times)