I was generally uninclined to reply because I was, to put it very bluntly, unimpressed. This is not to say that I think there's anything wrong with your suggestions--to the contrary, I think they're all good--I was simply expecting MORE. I for one am ready for Dwarf Fortress to start using pixels instead of nothing but ASCII characters. When I imagine improvements to the GUI, I see each dwarf's Thoughts & Preferences screen augmented with a picture of that dwarf, so if, for example, "her close-set violet eyes have slit pupils", I can see that for myself instead of just reading it. Similarly, I should be able to view my fort (the aboveground portion, at least) from any angle, zooming in & out and rotating on all 3 axes. Or, Adventurer mode should offer a first-person view option, and use similar functionality in Fort mode for taking 3D screenshots from literally any point on the map.
But your goals were more modest. Okay, let's go with that. As for your paper, first off, I would enlarge all of the screenshots so that they fill 100% of the horizontal space: As they are now, the text is almost large enough to read, which is annoying. I would make the list of flaws in your Section 4 a bit shorter ("the game with cruel vindictiveness does not forgive any mistakes", in particular, seems quite extraneous), and Section 5 (your actual suggestions) longer: You can do both at once by listing small flaws with your proposed improvements to them in Section 5.
Additional suggestions:
Include a mention of how various names (especially dwarf names) are oddly truncated, and often unrecognizable, in menus like the Health screen or assigning furniture.
Place much greater emphasis on mouse functionality: At present, it's not useful for much except mining designation, and even then (at some zoom levels), the game can only read a mouse click if it's in the upper-left hand area of the Active window. Additionally, it would be very convenient to be able to access common menu commands, like Look and View Unit, by right-clicking on the tile in question.
I personally think the game's Active window should always be a perfect square (when it covers less than the entire screen), but that's just a matter of taste.