Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[Dunamisdeos]

Hey folks! Dunamis here, all around good-looker and talented Lady-Wood-Elf rogue. I recently ran into some troubling professional problems. I was chased out of Riften for breaking into the Jarl's wardrobe and walking out dressed in her very own fine clothes. I won't go into detail, but 9 city guards, 3 trolls, 6 wolves and a Khajiit were involved in my escape. Suffice it to say, things got sticky.

I've therefore instituted the BIB policy: Blame It on Brand-Shei.

Brand-Shei, for those of you who are unaware, is was an innocent street vendor in Riften. He has been framed (by some vision of lovliness) for pickpocketing, and resides in the city jail. As a matter of misdirection, I will be planting one item from each major theft or assassination either on his person or within his cell without his or any guards noticing.

With any luck, he will soon develop a reputation as a legendary thief and criminal mastermind, reputed to be able to leave his cell under full guard, travel to any point in Skyrim, and return with his ill-gotten goods unseen. Clearly, his denials are mere mockery of the prison guard.

.....Anyone else have anything to add? I'm down for anything that adds challenge, but most importantly humor to my career as a master thief, assassin, and female hair model.

Spoiler: I'm Your Host, Dunamis (click to show/hide)

[BFEL]

This is brilliant in so many ways.

As for added challenge, any corpses you might accidentally accrue along the way must ALSO be brought to his cell. Though you might need the final reanimation spell to get them through doors and such. A reanimation staff might work in a pinch as well IIRC.

[Iituem]

That sounds hilarious.  I look forward to a grand framing adventure!

[Dunamisdeos]

Hello, readers! I decided that it would be prudent to attempt a dry run. In doing so, I discovered that a some minor alterations needed to be made to BIB. While it was possible to sneak into the jail undetected (Riften City Guards are quite manageable with the proper oral soporific), it seems that neither Brand-Shei nor his uppity cellmate are capable of sleep.

Spoiler: Pictured: The proper oral soporific for a Riften City Guard (click to show/hide)

Spoiler alert: it's an arrow.

Our dear friend Brand-Shei was therefore quite aware of what was happening. Initially, he protested hotly, but by the end he simply asked me to be careful with the things I was silently placing about his cell and person. He even asked me to be careful with one of the larger items. Such a good sport.

Spoiler: Blame It on Brand-Shei, a Dry Run (click to show/hide)

I do believe this was a most successful dry run. Unbeknownst to Mr. Shei, a key to the Black-Briar Manor and a Silver bar from the safe in the Markarth treasury were left in his pocket. Also, three city guard helmets were tidily placed in the bucket near his bed across from the three city guard corpses (artfully draped).

Until next time!

[Groovydog5]

Well this seems very interesting.

I look forward to Brand-Shei accumulating a bunch of random crap.

[SeriousConcentrate]

This sounds worthy of a PTW.