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Author Topic: on elven diplomacy  (Read 2707 times)

SRD

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Re: on elven diplomacy
« Reply #15 on: April 05, 2012, 10:53:32 am »
kobolds: sneaky gossiping bitches (the chicks you used to go to school with)
goblins: the dumbass bully who can't fight (We all have one)
elves: The Teacher.
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Quote from: LoneTophat
EDIT: HOW DO I STOP THE BLEEDING!
SUPEREDIT: Nevermind. Bled to death ._.

Loud Whispers

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Re: on elven diplomacy
« Reply #16 on: April 05, 2012, 10:55:10 am »
Quote from: SRD on April 05, 2012, 10:49:55 am
No, the kobolds 'try' to steal, then they run away like pussies. The elves are strict bitches, if you start a war with them, they actually fight you. They don't retreat.
The Kobolds navigate a death trap in the middle of nowhere, searching for any trinkets they can bring back to feed their ugly families. Alone. With nothing but a dagger. And even then, they usually manage to take down a Dwarf or two.

The Elves?

Pft, they rarely start wars, even when you pillage their caravans.

And even then, they sneak, with their buddies for support. And they leave most of the fighting to their animals.

Kobolds > Elves
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SRD

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Re: on elven diplomacy
« Reply #17 on: April 05, 2012, 10:57:45 am »
The kobold is the bitch thief who is to weak to apply for a job at McDonalds because he's a PUSSY.
The elves are strong enough and ballsy enough to be able to take alot of shit, which is why they are confident enough that they are the superior to kobolds to not start wars.
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Quote from: LoneTophat
EDIT: HOW DO I STOP THE BLEEDING!
SUPEREDIT: Nevermind. Bled to death ._.

Garath

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Re: on elven diplomacy
« Reply #18 on: April 05, 2012, 11:02:00 am »
Quote from: nopil3os on April 05, 2012, 10:50:36 am
kobolds: sneaky buggers
goblins: dumb cannonfodder
elves: arrogant bastards

Humans are the real arrogant bastards, talking down at dwarfs who can chop them to pieces. Elfs are just not in touch with reality.
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Quote from: Urist Imiknorris
Jam a door with its corpse and let all the goblins in. Hey, nobody said it had to be a weapon against your enemies.
Quote from: Frogwarrior
And then everyone melted.

Loud Whispers

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Re: on elven diplomacy
« Reply #19 on: April 05, 2012, 11:02:25 am »
The Kobold is the "bitch thief" who just stole your pancreas, without you bloody noticing.
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SRD

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Re: on elven diplomacy
« Reply #20 on: April 05, 2012, 11:03:52 am »
The 'bitch thief' couldn't stab a prickleberry and steal its seeds!
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Quote from: LoneTophat
EDIT: HOW DO I STOP THE BLEEDING!
SUPEREDIT: Nevermind. Bled to death ._.

nopil3os

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Re: on elven diplomacy
« Reply #21 on: April 05, 2012, 11:08:45 am »
Quote from: Loud Whispers on April 05, 2012, 10:55:10 am
The Kobolds navigate a death trap in the middle of nowhere, searching for any trinkets they can bring back to feed their ugly families. Alone. With nothing but a dagger. And even then, they usually manage to take down a Dwarf or two.

i didn't see it that way yet, but you have a point there.
on the other hand: they run like hell once spotted by the stork chained at my entrance
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Quote from: Splint on June 09, 2012, 05:51:39 am
I'd be shocked if dwarves didn't eat the demons they killed. After all, if they're willing to eat a poison spewing monstrosity, why not a flying dinosaur thing that hates all life?

SRD

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Re: on elven diplomacy
« Reply #22 on: April 05, 2012, 11:10:30 am »
OMG THAT KITTEN IS STARING STRAIGHT AT ME.. ALL IS LOST... FUUUCKK.... RUNNN.... AMG.... KITTEN... STARING.. INTO MY SOUL...
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Quote from: LoneTophat
EDIT: HOW DO I STOP THE BLEEDING!
SUPEREDIT: Nevermind. Bled to death ._.

Loud Whispers

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Re: on elven diplomacy
« Reply #23 on: April 05, 2012, 11:14:46 am »
Quote from: nopil3os on April 05, 2012, 11:08:45 am
on the other hand: they run like hell once spotted by the stork chained at my entrance

In general experience, getting spotted results in the military getting sent in.

Military > Kobolds (mostly).

Quote from: SRD on April 05, 2012, 11:03:52 am
The 'bitch thief' couldn't stab a prickleberry and steal its seeds!



Nice seeds
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SRD

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Re: on elven diplomacy
« Reply #24 on: April 05, 2012, 11:15:53 am »
oh yeah grandmaster everything kobolds vs weak elves with no weapons..
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Quote from: LoneTophat
EDIT: HOW DO I STOP THE BLEEDING!
SUPEREDIT: Nevermind. Bled to death ._.

Garath

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Re: on elven diplomacy
« Reply #25 on: April 05, 2012, 11:16:21 am »
Quote from: SRD on April 05, 2012, 11:10:30 am
OMG THAT KITTEN IS STARING STRAIGHT AT ME.. ALL IS LOST... FUUUCKK.... RUNNN.... AMG.... KITTEN... STARING.. INTO MY SOUL...

Kobold thief stabs stray kitten in the head, fracturing the skull and tearing the brain
The kitten has been struck down

Now run! They're gonna sic the dogs on me.
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Quote from: Urist Imiknorris
Jam a door with its corpse and let all the goblins in. Hey, nobody said it had to be a weapon against your enemies.
Quote from: Frogwarrior
And then everyone melted.

Loud Whispers

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Re: on elven diplomacy
« Reply #26 on: April 05, 2012, 11:17:41 am »
Quote from: SRD on April 05, 2012, 11:15:53 am
oh yeah grandmaster everything kobolds vs weak elves with no weapons..

Nope, equal sides, see the dead Kobolds? There's also a one armed Kobold somewhere.
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SRD

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Re: on elven diplomacy
« Reply #27 on: April 05, 2012, 11:18:10 am »
Quote from: Garath on April 05, 2012, 11:16:21 am
Quote from: SRD on April 05, 2012, 11:10:30 am
OMG THAT KITTEN IS STARING STRAIGHT AT ME.. ALL IS LOST... FUUUCKK.... RUNNN.... AMG.... KITTEN... STARING.. INTO MY SOUL...

Kobold thief stabs stray kitten in the head, fracturing the skull and tearing the brain
The kitten has been struck down

Now run! They're gonna sic the dogs on me.
The cage lifts up and 500 cats explode onto the kobold

The cat bites the kobold, but the attack is deflected by the kobolds skin.
The cat bites the kobold, but the attack is deflected by the kobolds skin.
The cat bites the kobold, but the attack is deflected by the kobolds skin.
The cat bites the kobold, but the attack is deflected by the kobolds skin.
The cat bites the kobold, but the attack is deflected by the kobolds skin.
The cat bites the kobold, but the attack is deflected by the kobolds skin.
The cat bites the kobold, but the attack is deflected by the kobolds skin.
The cat bites the kobold, but the attack is deflected by the kobolds skin.
The cat bites the kobold, but the attack is deflected by the kobolds skin.
The cat bites the kobold, but the attack is deflected by the kobolds skin.
The cat bites the kobold, but the attack is deflected by the kobolds skin.
The cat bites the kobold, but the attack is deflected by the kobolds skin.
The cat bites the kobold, but the attack is deflected by the kobolds skin.
The cat bites the kobold, but the attack is deflected by the kobolds skin.
The cat bites the kobold, but the attack is deflected by the kobolds skin.
The cat bites the kobold, but the attack is deflected by the kobolds skin.
The cat bites the kobold, but the attack is deflected by the kobolds skin.
The cat bites the kobold, but the attack is deflected by the kobolds skin.
The cat bites the kobold, but the attack is deflected by the kobolds skin.
Logged
Quote from: LoneTophat
EDIT: HOW DO I STOP THE BLEEDING!
SUPEREDIT: Nevermind. Bled to death ._.
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