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[CaptainBadwheel]

So my Fortress went from getting owned by elves, badgers, and macaques, to cowering behind a atom smasher, to cowering behind two atom smashers, to dropping the elves into the river.
Well the river has gotten quite full (elves, goblins, trolls, and a cat in a cage I accidentally dumped in there) so we no longer cower.  Now we shoot them from our dread black obsidian tower with red fortifications who's top is eternally shrouded by a cloud of bees (18 hives worth).  Then we run them down with our steel plated infantry.  Sometimes we even fight goblins.
Now I have a moat that surrounds our fortress on three sides which, due to an slight engineering oversight, is actually wider than the river and full of magma (the magma part isn't the oversight).  I now take perverse pleasure in watching bodies get dumped into it. I've also set up a "twin dragons" system which is a pair of pumps flanking a steel drawbridge which rapidly drain the moat onto whatever is in front of them. The moat can also be rapidly filled with water so I could use the dragons to put out fires theoretically.
I have a trap above the first cave level that kills forgotten beasts with magma, (necessary, there's one down there that killed a quarter of my fort in 10 seconds with a single fart.)
Also my Baron is a super chill ambidextrous legendary miner who likes, green glass, flasks, thrones, and shoes. Mostly he orders shoes. Also he's a nudist.
The mayor on the other hand, churns out babies and ordered a Sterling silver bed.

[Melissia]

At least they didn't order a candy bed.