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[Mister Always]

So, my current map is cool and all. It has a brook, a volcano (magma forges, oh god yes) and all that. It also has kimberlite (though I'm not sure how much).

"So what?" sez you. "Bum kimberlite. All it's good for is lookin' pretty and containing diamonds."

Look at this.

http://tinyurl.com/pacdwarf

"Bum Pacman," sez you, "this is Dorf Fortress! Where everything we do is DORFY AS FUCK!"

"Indeed," sez I, "so hear me out."

1. Replicate this maze (entirely in kimberlite - or microcline, if I don't have enough kimberlite.)

2. Throw in either four trained millitia dorfs and a gobbo (who I might just train in a danger room as per http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=93237.0 ) or four gobbos (possibly danger roomed) and one dorf.

3. Watch them reenact the coolest video game of all time.

My only question is, should I include traps? And what would be the best way to keep that/those gobbos moving around?

Hopin' to hear from ya, fellow inmates.

[Tharwen]

Mod in creatures made of snow which use a 'o' for their icon. Tame a load of them and chain them up where the blobs should be. The goblin should run around, killing them each in one hit.

The dwarves will probably end up forming a conga line, by the way. I'm not sure of a way around that without doing something like raising bridges randomly to make them repath.

[Mister Always]

Yeah, I was worried the pathing might bugger stuff up.

...oh well ;_;

...I do have another idea now, though. Capturing large portions of gobbo sieges in cage traps, and then throwing them all into a danger room (which will be 1x1 - just because I'm a jerk). As I've been told, this will increase their skills pretty well. I'll leave them in there for, oh, a year or so, maybe two, then pull the lever that opens the door to freedom. Wait, did I say freedom? PSYCHE it's more cage traps.

Then I will put all the gobbos near my front door, and piss off the elves enough that they come and siege me.

I will then unleash the highly trained and probably furious gobbos on my elves. If they manage to get away, more power to them, but they won't be coming back any time soon, I'll bet. It'll also be amusing to watch.

If I capture any elves, I'll eat them. 'cuz they look tender.

This'll be a fun little project.

[Oliolli]

If they manage to get away, more power to them...

And so began the goblin civil war.

[Mister Always]

If they manage to get away, more power to them...

And so began the goblin civil war.

That'll be something though, isn't it? I mean, some goblin soldier leaves home, kisses his wife and little goblin children goodbye...

He does not return the next season, along with, y'know, most of the invading army. A funeral is held in remembrance, although there is no body to bury.

Then, two years later, he returns, stronger than ever and covered in elf blood! Tears and joyful reunion all 'round!

"Papa, papa, I thought you died!"
"I'm here now, son. We can be a family again."

;_;

[elf-fondling human]

Then he has to sit his kid down and begin the potentially traumatizing tale of how the lad was kidna- er...adopted.

[Necro910]

Then he has to sit his kid down and begin the potentially traumatizing tale of how the lad was kidna- er...adopted.

Gobbo says to the child, stroking the child's beard softly...

[Oliolli]

"Adopted" dwarves have no beard ;_;