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Author Topic: I carved a giant archway into a mountain, and I wanted to show it to you.  (Read 2389 times)

Jurph

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Re: I carved a giant archway into a mountain, and I wanted to show it to you.
« Reply #15 on: April 23, 2009, 02:11:17 pm »
Quote from: Marko on April 23, 2009, 01:57:40 pm
"Siege? What siege? No no no... we're just here to trade you all these fine goblin iron goods! It's all just a giant misunderstanding..."

D: "Fine.  We'll take the narrow iron armor, the narrow iron boots, the narrow iron gauntlets, the narrow chain leggings, and the narrow iron helms."
G:  "Sure, sure!  It's cheap armor, it's fine.  We could part with that for a few *kitten tallow roast* [30], or maybe a dozen -obsidian mechanism-."
D:  "For that many roasts, we're going to need you to throw in your swords and shields."
G:  "Uh... well... okay, I guess we could leave our weapons..."
D:  "We'll also take the stacks of goblin bone.  And we're not interested in paying for any of it."
G:  "Not paying?  Wait, what stacks of--"

PEW PEW PEW
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Dreambrother has my original hammer-shaped Great Hall.  Towerweak has taken the idea to the next level.

Demetrious

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Re: I carved a giant archway into a mountain, and I wanted to show it to you.
« Reply #16 on: April 23, 2009, 03:16:24 pm »
Quote from: Jurph on April 23, 2009, 02:11:17 pm
PEW PEW PEW

I looked at that particular sound effect, looked at the avatar picture of you standing next to the muzzle of a GAU-8, and I laughed my ASS off.
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Quote from: Kishmond on April 14, 2009, 07:14:17 am
I like the fact we are seriously discussing how to drop dwarfs off towers using  kittens as cushions.

jaked122

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Re: I carved a giant archway into a mountain, and I wanted to show it to you.
« Reply #17 on: April 23, 2009, 03:38:34 pm »
the goblins would just ask "can we go through there?" we'll give you our goods free.
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Wild Goose

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Re: I carved a giant archway into a mountain, and I wanted to show it to you.
« Reply #18 on: April 23, 2009, 04:24:53 pm »
The goblins could spontaneously grow beards upon seeing the fortress.

"Siege?  No, we're...migrants.  Yeah, migrants.  Mountainhome's having a famine, don't you know?  That's why we're all nar...skinny, and all."
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"Adventurer's Motto; Take everything not nailed down and nail down whoever tries to stop you."

"Whatever happens, we have got the ballista and they have not."

Quote from: Tiler on March 23, 2009, 05:30:11 pm
The dwarven economy is just a stand-in, from what I understand. As it is, it represents an actual economic system about as well as poison ivy represents a salad.

Byakugan01

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Re: I carved a giant archway into a mountain, and I wanted to show it to you.
« Reply #19 on: April 23, 2009, 05:44:26 pm »
If the GOBLINS grow beards, what do the ELVES do when they see the fortress? Besides shit themselves, of course. And I salute your epicness. Make sure that you don't have water and magma raining down at the same time, though.
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From Mr. Welch's 1350 things he is not allowed to do in a RPG:
148. There is no Gnomish Deathgrip, and even if there was, it wouldn't involve tongs.
171. My character's dying words are not allowed to be "Hastur, Hastur, Hastur"
218. No matter my alignment, organizing halfling pit fights is a violation.
231. I am not allowed to do anything that would make a Sith Lord cry.
240. Any character with more than three skills specializing in chainsaw is vetoed.

Duke 2.0

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Re: I carved a giant archway into a mountain, and I wanted to show it to you.
« Reply #20 on: April 23, 2009, 07:07:28 pm »
Quote from: Byakugan01 on April 23, 2009, 05:44:26 pm
If the GOBLINS grow beards, what do the ELVES do when they see the fortress? Besides shit themselves, of course. And I salute your epicness. Make sure that you don't have water and magma raining down at the same time, though.
As elves cannot grow beards, they will have no choice but to flee for their femininity.
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Quote from: Aqizzar on October 13, 2010, 04:19:47 am
Buck up friendo, we're all on the level here.
Quote from: Jim Groovester on August 08, 2010, 08:18:09 pm
I would bet money Andrew has edited things retroactively, except I can't prove anything because it was edited retroactively.
MIERDO MILLAS DE VIBORAS FURIOSAS PARA ESTRANGULARTE MUERTO

zchris13

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Re: I carved a giant archway into a mountain, and I wanted to show it to you.
« Reply #21 on: April 23, 2009, 07:11:12 pm »
Quote from: Duke 2.0 on April 23, 2009, 07:07:28 pm
Quote from: Byakugan01 on April 23, 2009, 05:44:26 pm
If the GOBLINS grow beards, what do the ELVES do when they see the fortress? Besides shit themselves, of course. And I salute your epicness. Make sure that you don't have water and magma raining down at the same time, though.
As elves cannot grow beards, they will have no choice but to flee for their femininity.
They start killing all the trees.  And eating them.
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this sigtext was furiously out-of-date and has been jettisoned

Jurph

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Re: I carved a giant archway into a mountain, and I wanted to show it to you.
« Reply #22 on: April 23, 2009, 07:22:57 pm »
I'll know my fort is Dwarfy enough when the elves show up wearing fake beards made from unicorn hair and decorated with kitten-bone, carrying leather waterskins full of booze, and wearing large aluminum armor -- all in the hopes that I'll mistake them for Dwarfs and invite them to the kegger in my Legendary Dining Room.
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Dreambrother has my original hammer-shaped Great Hall.  Towerweak has taken the idea to the next level.

ProfessorA

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Re: I carved a giant archway into a mountain, and I wanted to show it to you.
« Reply #23 on: April 23, 2009, 08:32:56 pm »
Now you have to carve a large ascii dwarf icon on either side on the ridge
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Gask

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Re: I carved a giant archway into a mountain, and I wanted to show it to you.
« Reply #24 on: April 23, 2009, 08:53:07 pm »
Nice set up  ;).
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http://l052.mybrute.com Come and meet my dwarf eating bear
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