So I started up Dwarf Fortress last night, after a several month hiatus. In celebration of my return, I decided to run a fort I titled Boatmurdered. I didn't expect that it would have anything in common with it's namesake, but I hoped that it would be enough enough to insult Armok, and therefore christen my return with the fresh blood of Dwarves. As it should be.
Since I was playing on an old laptop, I genned up a fresh world (Small size) and started in a 2X2 area. I was getting about 33 frames per second. I decided to go with a useless peasant start, and spent the extra money on keeping the anvil, and sacrificing one of my axes in exchange for more food (all the 2 cost foods, all the different boozes, all the different seeds, extra barrels, wood, etc. My starting location looked like it would have some wood, a low cliff, and a river. There was a warning about an aquifer, but it didn't appear in the site finder info, so I ignored it. (We will call this Fatal Mistake #1. I had never attempted a map with an aquifer before.)
Upon arrival, I paused and scoped out the area. The river and a pool were to the south east. Scattered in all directions save northeast were a few more pools. The north east was dominated by a low hill. (one Z-level high, did not go all the way to the edge of the map.) Upon seeing this hill, I knew it to be the start of my fort; a Keep from which all things would grow. I would start at the top, hollow it out, and smooth the walls, carefully shaping it to become the bastion of power I hoped it would be.
I ordered my two miners to grab picks, delegated another four to hauling duties, and ordered my wood guy to kill the wagon. Poor wagon. Starting from the top of the hill, they dug a 3x3 Stairway down 2 Z-levels, and I ordered the inside of the hill excavated. It was at this point I noticed that not all of the hill was made of solid rock. Some of it would have to be removed completely, and replaced with constructed walls. These walls alone would not protect my fort from a suitably motivated building destroyer. That's when I decided it was time to try another new thing; build a moat! (We'll call this Fatal Mistake #2.)
Fatal Mistake #3 came when my dwarves began digging the next level down. They declared some stone damp. I told them to shut up and dig. Next thing I know, I've got wet dwarves and a 7/7 water filled hole, directly under my keep. I would be great for a well, but it also meant that my dreams of a modest keep, buried in a hill, above an elaborate underground dwarf fort, were not to be. Hoping to avoid the aquifer, I moved to the west most part of the hill and tried again. Success! I dug a tunnel a little further west, and moved down three z-levels. It was there that I started the fortress proper.
This was Fatal Mistake #4. I did not notice that my fort was no longer under the hill. That when I channeled my moat, I had cut a hole through to my main fort tunnel. Thus, when I connected the river to my moat, and watched it full up, I was content. Then I noticed the moat on the left side wasn't filling very well. So I decided to check it out.
My lowest excavated level had 3/7 water in it. I couldn't put up walls. I couldn't stop the water. I was hosed. All my supplies were down there. As well as a few dwarves. Who were getting happy thoughts from the WATERFALL I had inadvertently built them.
*HeadDesk*
So I did what any good Dwarf Fort player should. I grabbed some popcorn and watched the Fun. I think the best part was when the caravan arrived, and all my stone crafts were at the bottom of my fortress-lake. Sigh.
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Topic: The Wrath of Armok: A Cautionary Tale (Read 1273 times)