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[Yourupsetman]

I have registered new nick, as at me an intimate problem.
My wife for last 2 years very much has grown fat...
I married the harmonous woman... To not tell, what it with a problem does not do anything, tries to move more, even accepted
LINK, has grown thin, but not much more, all this very much upsets me,
but I can is not right? How you will concern to if your wife very much will grow stout?

[ September 24, 2006: Message edited by: Toady One ]

[odd2k]

Hahahahahahahahaaha! Hahahahahahah! Ha!

God I love engrish spam.

[Silleh Boy]

(i must be bored.. but here goes..)

Ah, this looks like a job for Dr. Boy.

Let me see... After looking over and assessing your problem, i can only assume that you have posted in the wrong forum, and actually meant to request advice in the dwarf fortress forums instead, as you seem to be a lost inhabitant of a randomly generated world. Fear not however, for i have the solutions to your problems and more.

• Fat:  You should not discourage your wife from this, for you could with the right encouragement teach your wife to render the fat, before procressing it in an alchemists shop to create soap. Soap may not have uses yet, but it can be traded for food for your fortress.

• Movement: I'm not sure what you mean here. Is she causing path finding spam by locking the doors and forgetting to unlock them again? Try installing levers or pressure plates to allow you to unlock the doors and alleviate the path finding issues you seem to be suffering with her.

• LINK has grown thin: Thin.. as in Narrow? are you an elf, or a goblin maybe? Is your name link? Bah, and here i thought you where trying to remain anonymous. So your issue is that your wife is hoarding all the fat, and you are upset because your starving - partly due to path finding issues and locked doors.

• Stout Wife: So you're a goblin, married to a Dwarf, who keeps locking you away from the food supplies and causing path finding issues.
  

Okay, having looked over the issues, and thought about it carefully for maybe 0.5 seconds, i have come to a professional conclusion.

Your wife is afraid you will take away her fat, that she no doubt wishes to render for soap, and as such is locking you out and thus keeping you away from the food stock piles. If you wish to keep a dwarven lady happy, you must do the following.

• Grow a Beard
  
• Let her work without stifling her creativity.
  
• Learn how now to set off the pressure plates that lock the front door.
  

and last, but not least...

• Spend some quality time with her. Forge some axes, help her shave her beard, tell her you're sorry for interfering with her work.
  

Link, i hope this helps you.
Remember dwarven ladies may be thick skinned, but they're ladies none the less.

Dr. Boy signing out.

[Mud]

Yeah man, just tell her to convert the fat into soap after she renders it. Fat is automatically used in food unless you turn it unto soap, so make sure it's all used up before you turn the cooking option on.

Soon, she'll go back to eating one big mushroom and drinking a entire barrel of beer in a sitting, but won't eat anything else all season. She'll be thin in no time. But watch out, it's almost wintertime, so she'll probably get hugry faster than usual.

[loke]

LOL