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Author Topic: Epic Awesomeness  (Read 4822 times)

PTTG??

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Re: Epic Awesomeness
« Reply #30 on: July 03, 2008, 04:56:51 pm »
Only one game will ever have a chance for a player to say "This one time, I was a Walrus..."
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Jetman123

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Re: Epic Awesomeness
« Reply #31 on: July 04, 2008, 09:21:51 am »
I had an elf swordsman who ransacked a human town. Everyone - EVERYONE - guard, peasant, child, whatever, who came at him got their heads sliced off, or split in two. The guy almost NEVER hit limbs, he would just go straight for vital areas. If the first slash didn't kill him, the second one would. And he rarely ever had to counterattack.

Then a guard shot him three times in another town before I could do anything. :(
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When dwarves want to commit suicide, then by Armok, they _will_ commit suicide, even if they have to spend the rest of their lives working at it!

Loctavus

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Re: Epic Awesomeness
« Reply #32 on: July 04, 2008, 09:58:09 am »
I took a wooden throne from a fortress, then I got a whip and went hunting lions.
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Cthulhu

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Re: Epic Awesomeness
« Reply #33 on: July 04, 2008, 12:46:54 pm »
Loctavus ftw.
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Shoes...

Obsidian

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Re: Epic Awesomeness
« Reply #34 on: July 04, 2008, 02:31:14 pm »
My one-eyed adventurer was running around, looking for anything moving to kill, when he happens across a group of 3 giant lions. He kills one, but in the process, his OTHER eye is destroyed! Now he doesn't have any eyes, but does that stop him? Nope, then he charges the last two and brutally destroy them with his hammer, smashing them into trees. Then he goes off and clears out a goblin fortress. Without eyes. Then a goblin crossbowman kills him in the next tower. Oh well.
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Obsidian cancels common sense: Interrupted by insanity
!!carp!!

Torak

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Re: Epic Awesomeness
« Reply #35 on: July 04, 2008, 04:07:16 pm »
This and this.
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As you journey to the center of the world, feel free to read the death announcements of those dwarves that suffer your neglect.

One billion b-balls dribbling simultaneously throughout the galaxy. One trillion b-balls being slam dunked through a hoop throughout the cosmos. I can feel every single b-ball that has ever existed at my fingertips, I can feel their collective knowledge channeling through my veins. Every jumpshot, every rebound and three-pointer, every layup, dunk and free throw.

Cthulhu

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Re: Epic Awesomeness
« Reply #36 on: July 04, 2008, 05:28:43 pm »
From a nostalgia trip back to 33g.

Code: [Select]
You hack at The goblin in the right lower leg with your Iron scimitar!
The goblin loses hold of the small cow leather shoe.
The right lower leg flies off in a bloody arc!
The goblin loses hold of the small Rope reed sock.
The Axeman hacks at The goblin in the left lower leg with his Iron battle axe!
The goblin loses hold of the small cow leather shoe.
The left lower leg flies off in a bloody arc!
The goblin loses hold of the small Rope reed sock.
Teamwork, both on the same turn.
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Shoes...

Makrond

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Re: Epic Awesomeness
« Reply #37 on: July 04, 2008, 11:33:45 pm »
Damn drunk goblins...
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Quote from: Jusal
Darwinism? Bah! This is Dwarvinism!

Cthulhu

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Re: Epic Awesomeness
« Reply #38 on: July 06, 2008, 04:56:41 pm »
Something that just happened to me.  One of the most intense struggles I've ever had with an enemy.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Three body-hits in a row, like I just started hacking until she stopped moving.

The actual fight was several minutes long, I had to edit out large sections of it to fit the new 20,000 character limit.

Nearly my entire body was bruised, but somehow my only broken bone was my right pinky.
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Shoes...

Logical2u

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Re: Epic Awesomeness
« Reply #39 on: July 06, 2008, 11:22:40 pm »
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Yea, I legitly killed a demon.

I was even a high-master thrower, and it was failure -- even with a *Iron Spear* and +Coins+. So I just resorted to flailing him with a weapon that I thought would suck I mean, it's bronze -- I lost my steel mace to a bow-goblin who yellow-wounded my arms. BTW - talented macedwarf, expert shield-user, talent armour-user, super-dwarvenly everything. I still expected to get my *** handed to me.

Me and him, just smacking each other in the face -- and missing/blocking/counterattacking.  I get a lucky rush and knock a demon unconscious.

Then I repeatedly try and bash his head in with a flail. And win.

Another set of epic awesomeness.

This is more or less continuous stuff here...

This is how I lost the steel mace.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Yay, biting people to death!

Note that I have an arrow or two stuck in me at this point. Biting people is awesome, but not quite as awesome as what follows :D (This is quite a while later, by the way. Quite a few goblins died at this point. Just prior to pulling out the arrow I was lighting fires to speed up the decomposition process)

Code: [Select]
You pull out the Iron arrow.
You set a fire.
You stab The Guard in the upper body with your Iron arrow!
It is pierced through completely!
Atu Ngokangxut, Guard has been struck down.
Yea. My adventurer was hit with an arrow that caused him to lose his Mace. He buys a new one, comes back to the same fortress where he was hit, pulls out the arrow, and then instantly kills someone...

with an arrow that has been stuck in his arm for at least a month. Later on, he pokes out an eye and an ear with one hit from the arrow, and "Twists the iron arrow" in 2 guards to the point that they die. At that point I realize "Hey, why am I using an arrow? I'm a mace-dwarf!"
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Jude

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Re: Epic Awesomeness
« Reply #40 on: July 07, 2008, 09:58:19 am »
Basically everything that's ever happened in the brief amount of time I've played Adventure Mode has been epicly awesome. The first enemy I ever fought was some leopard and I smacked it so hard with my axe that it flew back a couple squares and collapsed into a lump of gore...once I fought three lions and killed them all despite them tearing off chunks of my arms...I choked one to death with my LEG...and once a giant bat attacked my and my remaining drunk in some dungeon, and my sword got stuck IN THE BAT...after which the bat proceeding to tear off my leg, take my waterskin, and bash my drunk to death with the WATERSKIN, all with my MASSIVE TWO HANDED SWORD still STUCK IN IT.

Idk if it gets better than this.
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Quote from: Raphite1
I once started with a dwarf that was "belarded by great hanging sacks of fat."

Oh Jesus

Asehujiko

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Re: Epic Awesomeness
« Reply #41 on: July 08, 2008, 03:27:00 am »
During the trantum spiral that destroyed my most recent fort(Urist "everybody's friend" the peasant died...) a trantumer set his sights on a clear glass window in the cotg office, overlooking the main hall from 8 stories up the atrium. The trantumer succesfully broke the window and strangled the guy's dog. This prompted said cotg to go beserk and hit the vandal in the right hand with his hammer. The result being the criminal being sent airborne through the hole he created, across the entire atrium(11 tiles) and desintegrating against another window owned by the mayor(all nobles had rooms on the 8th floor). Let's just say the rain of bodyparts on the ground floor was not benificial for the temper of his wife who was in said meeting room at that time.
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Code: [Select]
Tremble, mortal, and despair! Doom has come to this world!
.....EEEE..E..E.E...EEE.EE.EE.EEE.EE..EE.EE.E.EE.EE.E.EE.
......E..EE.EE.EE.EE..E...EEEE..E..E.E...EEE.EEE...E.EEE.
.☺..EE.E...E.EE.EE...E.EE..E..EE.EE.EE.EE..E...EE.EE..E.E
.....E..E.E.E.E.E.EE.E.E.EE.E...E.EE.EE...E.EE.EE.EEE...E
....E.EE.EEE.EE..EE.EE.E..EEEE..E..E.E...EEE.EEE..E.E..EE

Kagus

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Re: Epic Awesomeness
« Reply #42 on: July 08, 2008, 03:32:32 am »
I have a hard time believing any of your more fantastic accounts nowadays, Asehujiko...  Your previous willingness to fabricate has prevented me from taking your posts at face value.
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Asehujiko

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Re: Epic Awesomeness
« Reply #43 on: July 08, 2008, 07:14:47 am »
I did troll some people a bit with a few fake artifact and location names but i can't remember doing the same with actual fortress events other then the "backstory" of said artifact. I'll see which of the 91 folders named "region 1" in my backup folder is a recent save of this fort however. Could take a while tho.
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Code: [Select]
Tremble, mortal, and despair! Doom has come to this world!
.....EEEE..E..E.E...EEE.EE.EE.EEE.EE..EE.EE.E.EE.EE.E.EE.
......E..EE.EE.EE.EE..E...EEEE..E..E.E...EEE.EEE...E.EEE.
.☺..EE.E...E.EE.EE...E.EE..E..EE.EE.EE.EE..E...EE.EE..E.E
.....E..E.E.E.E.E.EE.E.E.EE.E...E.EE.EE...E.EE.EE.EEE...E
....E.EE.EEE.EE..EE.EE.E..EEEE..E..E.E...EEE.EEE..E.E..EE

Jude

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Re: Epic Awesomeness
« Reply #44 on: July 09, 2008, 11:28:54 am »
You can play as a walrus omg

Can somebody mod in that you can play as a bear or better yet, turn into one
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Quote from: Raphite1
I once started with a dwarf that was "belarded by great hanging sacks of fat."

Oh Jesus
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