What actually happened: my dad took me to a taco-truck which put down roots and I tried *again* to get a lengua taco, and even this place was out!
Instead I got recommended and tried a cabeza taco. It was fantastic! I sprinkled on some avocado salsa but it was pretty much just cabeza with some diced onion, dumped on a soft corn tortilla. Cabeza is, as the clerk described, "cow head meat". Google suggests that it's often considered the worst cut of the cow, and tends to be high in gristle and connective tissue. I loved it. It was shredded up like BBQ but instead of being pleasantly overspiced, it was a bit oily. She suggested "slimey" and she wasn't wrong, exactly. It was also more tender than I expect from cheap beef! I didn't see any weird bits or tissue, so maybe what I got was a well butchered sample. The taste did remind me of bulk sausage though, so I assume I'm just a lucky weirdo for honestly enjoying such "all the animal" cuts of meat.
They didn't even charge extra for it! For $3 taco was definitely better than the "deluxe" $5 shrimp tacos he and I also got, which supposedly had fancy sauces but were honestly pretty bland to me.
I also got to eat gma's hospital salad because she can't digest lettuce. Dad got me to try the creamy Caesar dressing, which was fine but distracted from the leaves and cheese. I guess I don't hate croutons anymore but they still feel like a distraction. A wad of fresh spinach leaves is a good salad IMO, maybe with some oil and vinegar (and tomatoes, mushrooms, and sharp cheese).
For my next trick I'm putting random things from my fridge in my new instant-pot to see what happens. If you read about a pressure-bomb going off in NC, know that I served !!science!!