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Author Topic: Tidings to a Giant Cave Spider  (Read 613 times)

Hamenopi

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Tidings to a Giant Cave Spider
« on: February 02, 2008, 04:51:00 am »

My dwarves came to this latest spot to claim it "The Breadcaves of Clearing" (Imas Es), but upon first survey I decided "Black Fire Pass" was more appropriate. Smack dab in the middle of a ridge line, our first priority was to set up the base camp.  It didn't take long for the 3 miners to have the farm plot, food storage, and kitchen hollowed out and by summer, the main dining room and grand hall was already constructed. The Mason and the Stonecrafter/Mechanic started getting to work when the dwarves head a dreadful scream, It was a resident giant cave spider, leaping out to claim it's first victim... A groundhog. As the expedition Leader surveyied the Spider nest, he noted, there was no way the spider could reach the fortress, and there was no way the dwarves could reach the giant cave spider silk. He devised a plan. Designating the cliff above to be a pit, he charged himself to meticulously carve a route to the liar, only breeching it moment after they make their first kitten sacrifice to the spider. The mason nodded to the plans and build a few floodgates as the stone Crafter/mechanic made mechanisms to operate them. All the dwarves had to do then was to convince the fisherdwarf to go along with the plan. At that moment, a herd of horses appeared next to the liar and the spider attacked.
"GO GO GO" announced the leader. Tearing through the wall, he only saw the back legs of the spider chasing the horses off into the distance. The ever drunken brewer showed up and placed a flood gate at the spider's lair entrance, tripping over every fricken web he could, as the mason started tossing rocks, making the fastest wall ever created.
The wall was up! Surprisingly no one ran away during that mad dash, and no one acted overly stupid. The Kitten even lived through the ordeal. But dwarves, being the supersticious sort, each season, toss a kitten outside the spiders liar and let the monster feast while the secret entrance to the fortress, thru the sewer network, is opened and the outer door is sealed shut so our weaver can harvest the rich, silky smooth material the great giant cave spider deity provides its dwarves.
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Dwarfaholic

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Re: Tidings to a Giant Cave Spider
« Reply #1 on: February 02, 2008, 06:52:00 am »

That's... effective.
But... but... you're playing... as a... dwarf? Effective? Dwarf?
Not... insane?

Isn't that just... wrong?

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Greiger

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Re: Tidings to a Giant Cave Spider
« Reply #2 on: February 02, 2008, 10:29:00 am »

I sacrificed kittens to the magma men in a magma vent before.  Though I don't think the kittens ever made it to the magma men at the bottom of the vent.

I wasn't getting anything out of the exchange though. The vent was in a steep enclosed valley and my magma forge access was blocked with a steel grate.

[ February 02, 2008: Message edited by: Greiger ]

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