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[Nikita]

Crazy ideas. Stupid dwarf tricks. Ways of achieving unusual effects through mundane means.

Share your ideas on how to do something absolutely dwarven, even if you're not sure if it would work in reality. Bonus points for usefulness and for not using exploits (though this is optional).

I'll start.

Crime generator

Build two adjacent rooms, 3x3 or so. Make tantrum-proof doors/gates/bridges from each room into corridor and between the two rooms, activated by levers. Put a dwarf into one of the rooms and drive him to the point of tantruming. Place the item to be tantrummified in the other room. Then open the door and hopefully the dwarf will kick some butt, generating crime in the process. Only citizens of your fortress are capable of crimes.

Inputs - crimes:
Dwarf - murder of a dwarf
Tame animal (e.g. kitten) - murder of a tame animal
Workshop - destruction of a building.
Door/bed - toppling furniture

Once the dwarf ends up in the second room, lock the door between the rooms. The now-unoccupied room becomes the input room.

The dwarf screws things up and generates a crime. Why would you want a crime? To convict somebody, of course! Convicted dwarves can be put in cages, chained to restraints, beat up or murdered without causing a loyalty cascade (though there are easier ways to do the latter).

Upgrade 1: give the dwarf military skills for advanced butt-kicking.
Upgrade 2: berserk vampire dwarf. They never stop destroying stuff!
Upgrade 3: werewolf vampire berserk dwarf. Restores full health every full moon (if the fictims fight back)
Upgrade 4: dump things from the ceiling or deliver victims by mine-carts.
Upgrade 5: lever to drown/melt/carbonise/atom-smash the dwarf inside (because safety is important!)

[Absentia]

You know the wiki has a whole page of these, yes?

The next time I do a volcano embark, I'm going to try to do magma land mines: a pressure plate linked to a floodgate, which will fill the nearby reservoir beneath a powered pump and spray the area with automated magma goodness.

[martinuzz]

A crime generator that can produce crimes which allow the player to incarcerate a dwarf of their choice, at their leisure would certainly be very handy.
Putting a dwarf in jail before he tantrums is one of the better ways to deal with those.

I don't think it would be too hard either. just make an open outside box room, with overhangs to prevent the dwarf from climbing out (you never know).
Unhappy thoughts for 'caught out in the rain' and 'slept in the mud', and possibly 'nauseated by the sun' are decent bad thoughts to help drag a dwarf down to tantrum.

[YAHG]

A crime generator that can produce crimes which allow the player to incarcerate a dwarf of their choice, at their leisure would certainly be very handy.
Putting a dwarf in jail before he tantrums is one of the better ways to deal with those.

I don't think it would be too hard either. just make an open outside box room, with overhangs to prevent the dwarf from climbing out (you never know).
Unhappy thoughts for 'caught out in the rain' and 'slept in the mud', and possibly 'nauseated by the sun' are decent bad thoughts to help drag a dwarf down to tantrum.

Plus if you made it some sort of discipline training pit with a levered door behind a window to a enemy corpse stockpile etc., rotate people through to get them trained up with door open and close to just generate crimes.

You could also dump in food to rot so they would be unhappy but never starving