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[GhostDwemer]

This is the first time I've dunked a noble in magma! Fricken' vampire queens, I hate 'em. This one killed several thousand dwarves, she had to go. I wish there had been a way to get my Duchess to kick her into the magma while screaming "THIS. IS. DWARF FORTRESS!" but the old profiled lever behind a door next to a constructed wall holding back the magma does do the trick, albeit with less panache.

[ImagoDeo]

I've yet to reach that milestone. Even had one fort with two vampires - my mayor and my count, respectively - but I didn't heartlessly slaughter them.

I put them in burrows that did not intersect any sleeping quarters. They could still wander around freely, but they couldn't accept any drinking jobs because no one ever slept in their burrows.

[GhostDwemer]

Oh, I have another vamp in this fort, he's killed a half dozen FBs by himself down in the caverns, where he is harmlessly locked away. Being a vampire won't get you immolated in my fortresses, but being a queen who has killed several thousand of her own dwarfs, and then coming to my fort openly bragging about it will.

[SixOfSpades]

I wish there had been a way to get my Duchess to kick her into the magma while screaming "THIS. IS. DWARF FORTRESS!"

If you put the two of them in a squad with no uniforms and set their sparring grounds on a tiny platform over a volcano, one of them would eventually dodge over the side. But, given the vampire's vastly superior combat skills, does that mean that you'd have a roughly 99% chance of losing your duchess? Or is it purely a 50/50 chance, meaning you could just savescum a couple of time until it works?

[Bumber]

I wish there had been a way to get my Duchess to kick her into the magma while screaming "THIS. IS. DWARF FORTRESS!"

If you put the two of them in a squad with no uniforms and set their sparring grounds on a tiny platform over a volcano, one of them would eventually dodge over the side. But, given the vampire's vastly superior combat skills, does that mean that you'd have a roughly 99% chance of losing your duchess? Or is it purely a 50/50 chance, meaning you could just savescum a couple of time until it works?

Wouldn't the vampire's dodge skill work against her? Duchess gets a pair of shields (if that helps prevent dodging,) Queen gets some lame weapon (wrestling risks throwing, I think.)

[BoredVirulence]

I wish there had been a way to get my Duchess to kick her into the magma while screaming "THIS. IS. DWARF FORTRESS!"

If you put the two of them in a squad with no uniforms and set their sparring grounds on a tiny platform over a volcano, one of them would eventually dodge over the side. But, given the vampire's vastly superior combat skills, does that mean that you'd have a roughly 99% chance of losing your duchess? Or is it purely a 50/50 chance, meaning you could just savescum a couple of time until it works?

Wouldn't the vampire's dodge skill work against her? Duchess gets a pair of shields (if that helps prevent dodging,) Queen gets nothing.

Queen should get a training weapon (or any weapon really). Wrestling training should increase chance of throws, while fairly uncommon they can be deadly not at the edge of volcanoes. Shields might reduce dodging, maybe. Can't hurt though.

[Bumber]

Wouldn't the vampire's dodge skill work against her? Duchess gets a pair of shields (if that helps prevent dodging,) Queen gets nothing.

Queen should get a training weapon (or any weapon really). Wrestling training should increase chance of throws, while fairly uncommon they can be deadly not at the edge of volcanoes. Shields might reduce dodging, maybe. Can't hurt though.

Yeah, remembered that a minute later. Any weapon you don't mind losing, really.

[wierd]

Back in .40d, I had a baron I *hated*. Not just annoyed with, or found displeasurable-- I am talking, pure, unbridled hatred.

This individual had taken it upon himself to relentlessly forbid the export of ANYTHING that was either made of green glass, copper, or a craft good (by forbidding the export of scepters, and due to .40d's legal system, any dwarf transporting a bin containing a forbidden item to the trade depot was immediately guilty and subject to the justice system--meaning any dwarf carrying a bin of general craft goods--naturally containing scepters as well as mugs, amulets and the like-- would get locked up for a long ass time, and probably die of thirst) at the exact moment that the trade caravans with essential supplies would show up.

Seriously, I would have to issue the transport orders the exact moment the caravan entered the map, keep the finished goods piles painfully close to the depot, and then trade as soon as I possibly could and hope to armok's beard that that stupid asshole wouldn't mandate a restriction on greenglass items and scepters before I could get the damned flux I needed.

Finally, one day, I asked on the forum just what, exactly, the consequences of murdering the baron would be. "Nothing", they said-- and so, I murdered him. I murdered him and didn't feel even the least bit sorry.

I locked him in a lavish death chamber, locked the doors, then filled the chamber with hot magma until he boiled inside his own, fat, ugly skin. THEN, I cast the magma into obsidian, cut the obsidian boulder that formed where he had previously been standing, and had it converted into stone crafts. Armok smiled on me, because I got one of his oh so precious scepters out of it- I then encrusted it with cut green glass, and then GAVE it to the elves.

Such was the intensity of my hatred for the little shit.

I haven't felt that feeling about a DF noble for a long time though. These days I'm just content to punish them in creative ways for their relentless mandates for mundane items. (Like stockpiling those items in their quarters.)

But oh-- yes.  I used the magma. I used the magma, and I liked it.

[DogsRNice]

snip

your my hero

[BoredVirulence]

Back in .40d, I had a baron I *hated*. Not just annoyed with, or found displeasurable-- I am talking, pure, unbridled hatred.

This individual had taken it upon himself to relentlessly forbid the export of ANYTHING that was either made of green glass, copper, or a craft good ... at the exact moment that the trade caravans with essential supplies would show up.

(...)

I locked him in a lavish death chamber, locked the doors, then filled the chamber with hot magma until he boiled inside his own, fat, ugly skin. THEN, I cast the magma into obsidian, cut the obsidian boulder that formed where he had previously been standing, and had it converted into stone crafts. Armok smiled on me, because I got one of his oh so precious scepters out of it- I then encrusted it with cut green glass, and then GAVE it to the elves.

[slow clap]
Fitting. Under similar circumstance I would use dfhack to manipulate his soul. I (being unfamiliar with this level of modding) would have tried to attach his soul to something, anything, to trade away. Because, in an ideal world, you could have attached his soul to that scepter, and you could imagine his soul being conscious of that which you did. I'm sure thats not possible though. I may have to look into it.
[/slow clap]

[shadowclasper]

I've yet to reach that milestone. Even had one fort with two vampires - my mayor and my count, respectively - but I didn't heartlessly slaughter them.

I put them in burrows that did not intersect any sleeping quarters. They could still wander around freely, but they couldn't accept any drinking jobs because no one ever slept in their burrows.

wait, that works? I thought vampires would leave their burrow to feed?

[ImagoDeo]

wait, that works? I thought vampires would leave their burrow to feed?

Mine never did. I even used burrow restrictions to save the life of a miner who fell asleep on a cavern floor once.