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Author Topic: A partner that doesn't lives nearby  (Read 1255 times)

wilsonns

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A partner that doesn't lives nearby
« on: July 02, 2012, 09:09:23 pm »

Hello. I don't think anyone knows me. I'm not new at Bay12 but nevr posted anything here. I'm in need of some life advice. Exactly 10 months ago I've started 'dating' a girl I met on the interwebz. We're both from Brazil. She's almost 20 and lives on Rio de Janeiro. I'm 16 an I live in São Paulo.Almost 600Kilometers from the city she lives to the one I live. That's quite far because both of us have no fixed income. We're just students. The worst problem there is that my parents are not really liberal about all that stuff about internet dating.The last tuesday, we got enough spare money and time to bring her here. It was the first time we've really met. I didn't tell them that we met on the internets, and brought she to my home to meet them. She stayed at the home of her aunt, and, we've spent a wonderful week together. We went to the movies, ate a lot of stuff and much more. She was to stay here till 12th or 13th of July. We would celebrate her birthday togheter and she would go. Unfortunatelly, she has to go tomorrow, because her aunt is going on a trip to another city because of some retirement documents of her husband[my girl's uncle, of course.]. The problem is that I don't know what to do, nor how to do. My parents will ask me to bring her home more times, and, I just can't do it. I'm afraid I can't visit her too because I need permission to buy a bus ticket to another city and as I told before, I didn't told my parents about the distance yet, and I'm not planning to do so either. Can I get some advices from my fellows Bay12ers?

[I'm improving my english, but it's still not good. Understandable, I guess ^^"]
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penguinofhonor

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Re: A partner that doesn't lives nearby
« Reply #1 on: July 02, 2012, 10:29:57 pm »

Good English. I'd break it up into more paragraphs, but seems fine otherwise.

Long distance relationships are really difficult when you're this young, because doing things like moving to another city are pretty huge for a relationship this early in your life. You're likely to change a lot as you grow up, so avoid anything life-changing.

How strict are the rules pertaining to long distance bus tickets? Would you be able to get one any other way? Perhaps through another adult you know?
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wilsonns

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Re: A partner that doesn't lives nearby
« Reply #2 on: July 02, 2012, 11:04:47 pm »

Thanks, I've been writing a lot recently.

I'm sorry, I didn't explained it correctly. Purchasing the ticket isn't a problem at all. If I save enough money, I can buy it without problems.

The real obstacle is that I need to be emancipated to embark in the bus. I would only be able to do so without the need of my parents approval after I reach 18[legal age here in Brazi]. I could get a Fake ID, but I have no clue about how to get one.

Heh... I just can't go to sleep...I'll be taking my girl to the bus station right after the sun rises. It won't take too long, I mean, about 5 hours or so.

[I think I did a good job with paragraphing this time.]
« Last Edit: July 02, 2012, 11:18:13 pm by wilsonns »
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Graebeard

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Re: A partner that doesn't lives nearby
« Reply #3 on: July 03, 2012, 04:39:26 pm »

Remember your time with her well.  You will think of it fondly as you age.

If you and her feel strongly about one another, then use that feeling to motivate and sustain long term plans.  You are 16 now, but do you know where you will be in 2 years?  Do you plan to leave São Paulo for school?  Does she plan to leave Rio?

Know that most relationships fail.  Long-distance relationships more so.  Take the time you have to enjoy her company.  Treat her well.  Be a good, and caring, and interesting person.  Don't be afraid to act upon your feelings, but don't presume that things will always work out as you wish.
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At last, she is done.

wilsonns

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Re: A partner that doesn't lives nearby
« Reply #4 on: July 04, 2012, 12:08:49 am »

Of course, we have some long term plans. Stuff like one of us moving to the other's side is not out of question. Her uncle who lives here, who I told about is going to help her with some tests to join the army as a officer[Something to do with nursery...]. The army provides housing nearby the base for the officers.

 I'll be done with my studies in five months or so and I'll get a job, so, things seem pretty more nicier than it was looking and sounding like yesterday.I mean, we really like each other and if we look at the bright side and try to make it happen, we'll have anything we want.

I had some relationships before. My past experiences make me realize that I've grown and what I'm going through makes me realize how much more I can grow up.

Thank you, fellow Bay12ers. After all, this was just matter of hearing some good news. I was blinded by fear of don't seeing her again in 10 months or so, but I don't think it will take too much longer to see again. I enjoyed the time I had with her, and I'll make it happen again as soon as possible. [The next time will be my birthday, probably.]
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Meistermoxx

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Re: A partner that doesn't lives nearby
« Reply #5 on: July 11, 2012, 06:12:11 pm »

If your parents like her, i dont see why they wouldnt accept that she lives so far away?
Btw how much does such a ticket cost?
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