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Author Topic: Dying below angry birds  (Read 2013 times)

Kriby

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Dying below angry birds
« on: May 23, 2012, 03:14:04 am »



Don't kill things directly above you, folks.
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Trapezohedron

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Re: Dying below angry birds
« Reply #1 on: May 23, 2012, 03:25:48 am »

Oh goodness... I never knew albatrosses could break ribs by falling into your chest.

Unless, if it was a particularly fat one, in which it is justified.
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caddybear

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Re: Dying below angry birds
« Reply #2 on: May 23, 2012, 03:32:02 am »

Aren't albatrosses very big?
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And then did ARMOK say, the east is the holiest of directions, and thou shouldst not stand there lest thou be strucketh down by my holiest of beards. And then did the dorfs did say, we shall build from the west, for more do we fear the beard of ARMOK than the strike of the elephant.

Trapezohedron

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Re: Dying below angry birds
« Reply #3 on: May 23, 2012, 04:23:10 am »

Aren't albatrosses very big?

And this is why you don't post drunk or sleepy, because your immense amounts of stupid will show.

To answer your question, yes, they are very big. They're probably heavy enough to break ribs when falling down at high velocities.
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Hammerstar

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Re: Dying below angry birds
« Reply #4 on: May 23, 2012, 03:56:29 pm »

Wikipedia sez: They have a wingspan of 11 feet.

So yeah. That's a big-ass bird.
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MonkeyHead

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Re: Dying below angry birds
« Reply #5 on: May 23, 2012, 03:59:04 pm »

Weapon idea.

Capture quantites of wild birds, caging them on a raised platform. Release when siegers arrive, and shoot them down with marksdwarves located nearby. Gravity should do the rest.

"The spinning buzzard corpse strikes the troll in the head, tearing the brain..."

Pointless, innefficient and compicated.

Sirus

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Re: Dying below angry birds
« Reply #6 on: May 23, 2012, 04:00:31 pm »

Weapon idea.

Capture quantites of wild birds, caging them on a raised platform. Release when siegers arrive, and shoot them down with marksdwarves located nearby. Gravity should do the rest.

"The spinning buzzard corpse strikes the troll in the head, tearing the brain..."

Pointless, innefficient and compicated.
In other words? Dwarven.
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Uzu Bash

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Re: Dying below angry birds
« Reply #7 on: May 23, 2012, 05:33:40 pm »

Inefficient yet recreational: ko-ball. The 'platter' stands by a platter at the edge of a cliff overlooking invading forces. The 'pitcher' throws a kobold over the platter, and the 'platter' swings an axe at the kobold's midsection. A foul swing fails to cleave the torso in two, but the score comes from the number of enemies hit by flying sections.

Run home? We're already home, and dwarves only run when they're on !!fire!!
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Trapezohedron

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Re: Dying below angry birds
« Reply #8 on: May 23, 2012, 05:49:10 pm »

Weapon idea.

Capture quantites of wild birds, caging them on a raised platform. Release when siegers arrive, and shoot them down with marksdwarves located nearby. Gravity should do the rest.

"The spinning buzzard corpse strikes the troll in the head, tearing the brain..."

Pointless, innefficient and compicated.
In other words? Dwarven.

Or catapult them with a drawbridge, and pretend your dwarves are playing Angry Birds against the horde of pig-faced goblins?
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Loud Whispers

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Re: Dying below angry birds
« Reply #9 on: May 23, 2012, 05:57:13 pm »

Angry birds?

...

Raven swarms?

I'm missing something here.

Uzu Bash

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Re: Dying below angry birds
« Reply #10 on: May 23, 2012, 06:33:41 pm »

I actually did cut a flying bogeyman out of the sky with a steel pick. Half hit me, the other half hit another bogeyman. Neither of us died, so it's not a very good story.
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